By Dustin Cabeal

For a moment, just one moment, this review nearly started off by saying, “it wasn’t as dumb as the previous two episodes.” After some thought though, the conclusion that was arrived at is this: it’s a different type of dumb this time around.

Unlike the other two episodes, the third chapter of Killing Bites begins with a tease of where the show is going. We find Hitomi and Cheetah girl dressed as maids and having pictures of their asses taken by what looks like a quarter of the college campus. Apparently, this school is full of desperate men in dire need of dirty photos to beat their meat too. Yuuya stands there, now with crutches, wondering how they got to this point. Cue the flashback!

Without any explanation Yuuya, Hitomi and Cheetah girl (which is the only thing anyone calls her, so that’s what she’ll be referred to in reviews) are found sitting in what’s obviously a club room. Half of the school saw the girls running around in animal form, and so they seem to think that they’re cosplayers and because Yuuya is flaunting is “relationship” with the two girls, they must pay the price… of dressing like maids and having their pictures taken. What, in the fuck. It goes without saying that it’s incredibly dumb and sexists to punish women for hanging out with a loser guy, but then it is also dumb and unbelievable to punish a guy for the same damn thing. Yuuya must be the king of the fucking losers because he talks them into it rather than telling these other nerds to go fuck themselves. If he had shown any kind of backbone, these fictional sexist characters would have backed the fuck off. It was infuriating to watch because it was plainly there only for the fanservice.

There is a lot more of this episode to discuss. It’s laid out for both Yuuya and Hitomi that the battle royale thing that is coming up is going to be a bloodbath. That if Yuuya fucks up, Hitomi will pay the price and that more than likely they’ll all be ganging up on her, even stranger, her benefactor/creator wants this to happen. It’s also revealed that he’s trying to take over Killing Bites and that the guy in charge knows this, and might let it happen. Because the battle royale angle was short-sighted and wouldn’t give any time to introduce friendly characters, so it’s changed to teams of three. Words like, “free-for-all” and “battle royale” are still used, but apparently they have no meaning in this world.

We meet two sisters that sleep with each other… that’s a thing in this world. They have the lamest powers because it looks as if they shoot blood from their fucking eyes. We learn this when they’re hired to scare everyone off from joining their team, leaving them to recruit the Bunny girl, who is not referred to as a girl, but rather the “B” word. She lost her backers and status because she can’t fucking fight and lost all her matches. Possibly because she’s a bunny and everyone else is a predator. Stuff happens and wouldn’t you know it, they team the fuck up.

This show is tiresome to watch. It goes by quickly, but then when you think about all the dumb stuff you just watched your head quickly starts to hurt. What’s worse is that everything the story introduces, it quickly changes for a similar, but a different version.

“Oh, we fight in this junkyard of dead bodies.”

“Now we fight anywhere, mostly parks!”

“We’re having a one-on-one battle royale… except for its teams of three!”

At some point, the story needs to find a consistent aspect to stick to, because now the morphers don’t even need to entirely transform to have animal parts. Convenient as they may be for the maid scene, it didn’t serve the story much. It’s billed as a way to “save energy” but at no point did it ever look like these fighters were tired. The only thing that’s been consistent is Yuuya and Hitomi’s relationship, but he’s pining for her at the moment. It’s evident that he’ll end up profoundly caring for her and trying to get her out of this crazy animal morphing fighting lifestyle, but he won’t. Because then the story is over and how will we see cute dolphin girls showing their ass as their giant tales hang out of their maid costumes and the skirt water on everyone for funsies.

The art is still the art. They enjoy making Hitomi’s ass look like a peach. There wasn’t much gore this time around, just a lot of blood slinging which was more annoying than gory. Also, the design for the Bunny girl was off-putting compared to the rest of the women as she was covered in a lot more fur. The action was a bit lazy in this episode, but it’s too be expected considering how much time was given to the photoshoot.

It’s a different type of dumb. That doesn’t make it better than the last two, and it doesn’t make it worse. They’re all clocking in at different spots on the dumb scale. The only hope this series has is that it’ll either do the fanservice better or figure out a stronger plot. Right now, it’s riding the fence between so many stereotypical storylines that it’s not doing any of them well… or even average. If you’re just looking to get a boner while watching animal women and occasionally animal men, then continue to enjoy and watch Killing Bites. The rest of us will be here suffering, hoping for something better or a midseason cancellation.

Score: 2/5

Killing Bites E.03
Liden Films