Oh, you’re back. Has it been a month already?

No need to talk through the power of exposition I know what you’re going to say.

20 Years Ago

What the fuck just happened!?! JESUS CHRIST!?! DID YOU JUST THROW ME BACK IN TIME!?! HOW DID YOU DO THAT!?! WHY DID YOU DO THAT!?! Judging by that suit it must be the 80’s. Why are you here? Shouldn’t you be stealing ice cream from kids and shooting lasers at GI Joe over ownership of Mount Rushmore?

Now.

God dammit Snake Eyes: Agent of Cobra stop doing that! All you do is whip me from place to place and time to time. What the hell does any of it mean? Why are you after Cobra Commanders son? What is the mission here? Are we working towards some answers or do you just plan on foisting more questions on me?

No, no, that’s okay. I didn’t expect you to tell me anything. Why would I? All I can do is perfectly interpret your silence, talk for you and then make meta observations on your silence. What choice do I have?

Hey, remember when Destro was in this book? Remember when you broke him out of captivity and we all thought that was pretty cool?

Man, wouldn’t have this been better if it was just you and Destro 48 Hours style? Or Beverly Hills Cop style. You know, whichever Eddie Murphy buddy cop movie is your favorite. I’m going to tell you this Snake Eyes, when you come to me next month you better have your shit together. You got two more issues before ya done. Befo’ ya done son! Get yo head on straight!

Score: 2/5

Snake Eyes: Agent of Cobra #3 (of 5) Writer: Mike Costa Artist: Paola Villanelli Colorist: Joana Lafuente Publisher: IDW Publishing Price: $3.99 Release Date: 3/25/15 Format: Mini-Series; Print/Digital