The New 52: Week 4 - Part 2

Finally, we’re done with this first month of books. Did you make it? Do you even still care? Did anyone else find the last week of releases to be lack-luster and just meh with only a few exceptions? Well we’re down to the last five books and after that we start all over! Let’s start with the shit first and work our way, well away from it.

The Fury of Firestorm The Nuclear Men #1


That’s the proper title by the way, and it’s just long enough to make you not want to buy it anymore just because. This marks the last series done by an artist/writer book from the New 52 and hey, guess what? It’s just bad. Also when the hell did Van Sciver’s art start to suck? Here’s the story… I don’t care. Literally couldn’t care less about it, I hate the characters that they were using that we became stuck with after Blackest Night and really they should have picked anyone else in the world to be Firestorm than those two annoying brainless characters. Also the fact that there were multiple Firestorms was almost interesting, until one of them said, “Sweet Cheeks.” I thought Gail Simone was helping on the writing how’d that slip through? Oh that’s write she’s a mediocre writer so it doesn’t matter. I hated this book, it did nothing and also introduced yet another clandestine group to the DCnU, seriously how many of these groups are running the world and how do they not know about each other? If they do and they begin fighting then we’ve got something. Otherwise I call bullshit.

Score – Pass, Firestorm still sucks.

Justice League Dark#1


I wanted to like this book, but it felt like a hallow attempt at making another Justice League book, because it was. Enchantress is going nut sand the regular JL can’t stop her! We better create a magic based team asap! I hate when a Justice League team is created when the regular team fails to get the job done. It’s not believable and never addressed in regular team’s book so it’s like it never happened. Easy way to start this story… don’t have the JL init! What’s wrong with just a bunch of crazy magic users seeing a threat and doing something about it? That’s what’s happening, but there is this weird inclusion of the JL for no reason other than showing the relation to the “Dark”team. Batman sucked, but I liked the new Zatanna. I dug her old costume, but that shit was getting dated. I’m on the fence with this one, I might give it a second chance but if they even mention Supes and the others I’ll bail. That being said I can’t recommend anyone else picking up this book.

Score – Pass, did you read Justice League Elite? It’s different, but just as bad.

Voodoo #1


So Ron Marz leaves Top Cow to come write this shit? I’m not sure who wins in this situation since he hasn’t even managed to finish Artifacts or put out any of Top Cow’s other flagship books on time.Voodoo’s an alien stripper. Did you watch Striptease? Yes you did you fucking nerd. This is just one long scene from Striptease, but at the end she’s an alien that kills a dude! Also the government is looking in on Voodoo or it’s another clandestine group… my money’s on the latter. Aside from Marz making her a stripper for the stupidest of reasons, he even takes the power that was associated with her name by making it the name of the stripper that’s the most popular… what an asshole. I was happy as shit to see a Wildstorm character getting their own book, but Marz just fucked this shit up bad. He’s also a formula writer so this book isn’t terrible, just not very good. I’ll give him one more issue as well, but if he doesn’t change the formula… we’re done.

Score – Buy, but be ready to drop.

I, Vampire #1


Loved it. Hands down probably my favorite book of the launch tied with All-Star Western #1. I just wish it wasn’t part of the DCnU. If this book had gone to Vertigo it would be one of their top selling books instantly. As it stands it’s a great addition to the world though. The narration was interesting and it had an I Am Legend (the book not the crappy movie) feel to it. Fialkov did a great job of slowly introducing us to this world and creating an interesting Vampire situation that could actually work in the DCnU, unlike what Marvel did with the X-Men last year. This book will probably be a sleeper hit as some core comic readers will not take to it and that’s their loss. This book actually does what the new DCnU was meant todo and that’s make a new and accessible world for new readers. This book can actually appeal to non-comic readers with the hook of vampires and once it has them in, it’s over. Pedigree their ass because they just became hooked on comics. This is exactly what all of the books should have been, a new and interesting writer and a very talented and fresh artists. Too bad there weren’t more books like this the reboot could have been something special.

Score – 5/5 Buy!

Superman #1


Now this isn’t a best for last deal, but I will say you should probably buy this book. First thing, it should have been a $3.99 book because it’s got content galore! After reading this, I can finally see what the hell they were doing with Supes. They Peter Parker’ed him. They changed his career from the dying print industry (ironic!) and updated the Daily Planet for a new generation. I liked that, but it was boring as shit setting that all up. Thankfully we got it out of the way, but that’s all this issue does is clean up and change Superman.So what was missing from this book? Clark Kent. Perez adds and subtracts the supporting cast, but guess what there are still too many people and I just wanted Clark. The opposite approach seems to have been taken with Superman when compared with Batman. In Bat’s we finally get Bruce Wayne, almost too much Bruce, but with Superman… Clark is absent in both titles with the exception of the end of the issues. Now with all its faults and Perez just doing work to get the set-up of the series out of the way it still had me until the end.

I don’t need to know who Lois is sleeping with. I don’t like that fact that DC Peter Parker’ed Clark so much that they took his marriage away, but at least Marvel didn’t have MJ banging some random new dude the next issue after. I don’t mind mature content or adults having sex (preferably outside of their costumes), but I did not need LOIS FUCKING LANE sleeping with some dick bag. Perez neutered her character from the strong tough as nails character that she’s always managed to be and turned her into what writer’s think self-sufficient woman are. She’s literally a dude with boobs and I hated that. Also I didn’t need it spelled out to me that they were having sex I could tell by the way it was drawn and the awkward moment between Clark and Lois, but to have her say, “Get back in bed” was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I’m done with her and frankly they should just kill her off instead of trying to hold on to this idea of her character that frankly doesn’t work anymore. As modernized as everything was in the book she still felt old and I think that was the worst part. They didn’t try anything new with her, but they needed to because what they ended up doing was making her obsolete. In my mind, Lois is dead because they don’t know what the fuck to do with her anymore.

Score – Buy, but you’ll probably want to drop it once Perez is off the book… or after the next issue.

Well that's it... did you like this format of review? Good because I'll probably keep doing this until I've dwindled down the amount of books that are worth buying. See you for Month 2 real soon!