Worst Movies of 2015 #5

You can't have the "Best" without the "Worst" so in typical Comic Bastards fashion we're bringing you the worst movies of 2015. Yeah we're steadily into the new year, but let's not forget what made for some painful cinema last year. Also, we could only pick the movie's we've seen. So if something isn't on our list and you're surprised... don't be. That means it was so bad we didn't even waste our time.


DAVE: Ted 2

Year on year, Seth MacFarlane seems to be losing the goodwill that many years of Family Guy had given him. While Ted was surprisingly funny, A Million Ways To Die In The West was muddled and Ted 2, the ill-advised sequel, little short of a disaster. The first film about Mark Wahlberg’s mid-30s slacker and his only real friend, a magical, foul-mouthed stoner bear, was a lot funnier than it had any right to be. It wasn’t smart, sure, but it didn’t need to be,

Ted 2, at points, tries desperately to be smart, to the point where it forgets to actually make jokes. That said, maybe it’s for the best - most of the jokes it does make fail to land - when one of your funniest moments is recycled from a decades old Family Guy episode, you know you’re in trouble. Supporting players include Amanda Seyfried (in for Mila Kunis, who wisely side-stepped this second installment) and Morgan Freeman, but even they can’t save this one.


CAMERON: Unfinished Business

Unfinished Business didn’t seem to have a lot going for it other than Vince Vaughn. He is one of those actors that can either be hilarious in films like Old School and Couples Retreat, or he can be extremely boring and just not funny. Unfinished Business falls into the trap of what I call “Party-Comedy” These films are basically Montage scenes of partying with exposition filled dialogue in between. Tons of films fall into this category like Sisters, Hot Tub Time Machine 1 and 2, and MANY others! The problem with UB, is it never even felt fun. I didn’t feel there was any stakes to this film. It was honestly very boring, and that’s why it takes my #5 Spot!


DUSTIN: The Longest Ride

I only saw this movie because I was home for the holidays and my father watched it. He thought it was a cowboy movie, which it does pretend to be, but he had never seen a Nicolas Sparks story brought to the silver screen. Someone dies. Someone always dies in a Nicolas Sparks story. The story is typical. There’s a twist after a death that makes everyone’s lives better. You’ll cry if you’re into the weak attempts at pulling on our heart-strings. The only other movie that does it this obviously was Inside Out (which almost made my list). Scott Eastwood apparently learned acting from watching paint dry. His performance is dull just like the rest of the movie. Alan Alda plays “old man dying” and it’s pretty obvious that he showed up for the pay check and because his character mostly got to sit down. The fucked up part is that, “The Longest Ride” isn’t really about the longest ride which is a bull riding term, but rather the story of the old guy. Pretty shitty title bait and switch if you ask me. Also the CG bull riding looks terrible.