I would find this comic absolutely balls-out cool… IF I lived on the ice planet Hoth and never heard of James Bond. Most of issue 2 of Agent of the Empire (AoE) takes place in a dinner party. Jahan Cross has been sent by the Empire to investigate the illegal droid market and the elusive “Iron Eclipse”. In-Ga 44, his droid, helps fill in the clues about the partygoers. Then, through conversations where the characters blab their plans like agents of SPECTOR, Cross uncovers connections among the Stark family.

After striking out with uber-babe Elli Stark, Cross goes to private quarters to interrogate Dah’Lis Stark. And by interrogate I mean shove his dick in her blue tentacles body. After the hentai session is over and Cross chows on some calamari (if you know what I mean), an unseen interloper stuns Cross. The agent of the empire wakes up to find Dah’Lis dead and the cops there to arrest him—just like in Goldfinger.

So Cross escapes on a speeder bike and In-Ga gets a stun baton up her keister like Kim Kardashian did from Ray-Jay.

The art is great—no problems there. The story lacks because the action is relegated to a moot chase scene at the end of the ish. Essentially, we are passively told what we need to know. That’s bad storytelling.

I gave this book one point for the art and one point for the man-on-blue octopus chic sex.

Score: 2/5

Writer: John Ostrander Artist: Stephane Roux Publisher: Dark Horse Comics Price: $3.99 Release Date: 1/11/12