Review: 47 Ronin

47 Ronin is a film that struggles to decide what it is. It is very much so two movies in one; on the one hand there is the story of the 47 Ronin a story so old and well-known in Japan that it has a cliché attached to it that goes: To know the story of the 47 Ronin, is to know the story of Japan. The movie actually includes this saying in their film at the very beginning during an awkward opening that resembled 300 more than it did the rest of the film. This was a mistake as it sets the precedence that the movie is going to tell that story, but so many liberties are taken along with all the changes made to fit the second aspect of our film into the same world. As I said this is a two-in-one film and so now we know the first part, the 47 Ronin, and as for the second… Keanu Reeves. Not only is everything about Reeves’ storyline completely out-of-place, but he is bigger than the movie or at least according to the cover for the home release which has his name floating above the title. I wish I was exaggerating when I say that Reeves is the entire second movie, but I’m not. With the inclusion of his character are all the fantasy elements that never quite fit with the story and fight against the fairly decent tale of the 47 Ronin that’s going on whenever Reeves isn’t on the screen.

What is the story of the 47 Ronin? Well in this version there are two lords: an old lord with a prosperous kingdom and a young lord whose land seems to always be covered in darkness.  The young lord works with a sorceress to shame the old lord in front of the Shogun, the result is the old lord committing Seppuku to retain his and his people’s honor. The young evil lord gets his land and his grieving daughter (after a convenient one-year mourning period). The old lord’s samurai become Ronin (samurai without masters) and their leader is thrown in a hole for the entire year until a few days before the wedding. He gathers the remaining samurai and they plot to kill the young lord and regain their master’s true honor. Oh and possibly return sunshine to the land?

Interesting right? In fact I bet you're wondering why Keanu is even involved in the movie and where they fit all the fantasy elements of the film. And what about that Pirate with the skull tattoo on his face??? What’s up with that guy?!? He’s in the movie for maybe thirty seconds and he just asks what someone is looking for… that’s it.

Keanu plays a half-breed that was raised by Tengu (forest demons of Japanese lore) that escaped after not wanting their life of killing to be the only thing he knew. Well now he’s a bad-ass killer and that’s actually all he does when he's not being beaten by the people he's trying to help. He falls in love with the old lord’s daughter and her with him. He’s treated like shit because he’s a half-breed even though everything he does and I mean everything he does, is for the lord and the people.

Keanu’s story feeds into the main story because they suddenly need him after shunning him for so many years. They use him to get swords which they have to get from the Tengu who look like alien bug creatures dressed like Buddhist monks. This journey to obtain the most powerful swords in the land replaces planning, strategy and money from the original story so you can probably guess how important it is to the overall plot of the film… not very. The swords that can cut through whatever you want are never brought up again except for a joke after their attained.

Here’s the real kicker of the story… the fantasy elements work with the exception of the Tengu. The CG for the film was actually some of the most impressive CG I’ve viewed in a live-action film. The sorceress receives a heavy amount of it when she changes forms, but there’s also a few other creatures shown along the way. Had that been the only addition the film would have been far better.

As it goes in Hollywood everything needs star power and though Reeves has been box office poison as of late, they still mashed him into the film. The silliest part is that they don’t let him act. Say what you want about the man’s performances over the years, he can actually act. Instead they barely let him talk and you could describe his mannerisms as “scared child” they’re that generic. As it stands the only actor to give a decent performance was Rinko Kikuchi (Pacific Rim). Her performance as the sorceress (credited as Witch) was a great addition to the story. She steals every scene that she’s in and continues to do so even after her character’s motivation stops making sense. As for Hiroyuki Sanada, the real star of the film as he has the bulk of the screen time, his performance is slightly better than the one he gave in The Wolverine. The story for his character was devoid of the range that the original tale had for his character which is the real shame. Think of it as if his character was asked only to make pizza and he makes great pizza, but then they come to him and say “okay now make just cheese pizza.” Well he makes a good cheese pizza, but we all know that it really means “safe and for everyone.”

It would honestly be interesting to see a new edit of this film in which Keanu Reeves is mostly cut out thus reducing his role to a minor support role. At that point I think the story of the 47 Ronin would actually pop and the beautiful CG could be appreciated. Somehow I don’t see that happening and so a potentially good movie will remain average at best.

Score: 3/5

Director: Carl Rinsch Writers: Chris Morgan, Hossein Amini Studio: NBC Universal Run Time: 119 Minutes

Review: Frankenstein’s Army

Written by guest contributor Brian Roe

There are times when it is perfectly acceptable to be a film snob. When you’re discussing truly great films or even mediocre films that could have been great in an attempt to peel back all of the layers of symbolism and sub-text to truly discover the exquisite core of shared experience that is only possible through the sublime medium of film, then being a snob is fully justified.

Other times it makes you a jack-ass that is incapable of enjoyment because you’re too busy trying to engorge your own ego because you’ve secretly realized that you’re a jealous, embittered failure.

Frankenstein’s Army needs no great critique. It is a carnival ride that delivers the goods in such a fast paced and constant way that it never stops to allow you to ponder too much on what is actually happening. It keeps moving and that is one of its strengths.

Russian advanced scouts invading Germany near the end of World War 2. You’ve got the kind but tough leader, the noble guy, the rapey guy, the silent but deadly sniper guy, the tough bad-ass barbarian guy, and the kid. And behind a constantly running camera, a documentarian intent on recording all of the action even if it means taking truly ridiculous risks to get the shot. You’ll be looking through this camera for the next 84 minutes so it’s a blessing that it seems to be held steady most of the time.

The Russians soon find themselves in a seemingly abandoned town that has some odd corpses and weird rusting weaponry lying around. Some of the atrocities shock even these hardened fellows but they keep going further into enemy territory in an attempt to help a besieged Russian unit. But all is not even close to how it seems and the soldiers soon find themselves neck-deep in weird war strangeness when they run across a disturbed doctor from the Frankenstein family and his chop-shop menagerie.

First person films can really be a pain to watch but director Richard Raaphorst and cinematographer Bart Beekman keep things moving but not nauseating. The camera view helps to make this an exciting ride in other ways. It conveys a sense of claustrophobia in tight spaces, it creates a sense of detachment from the other soldiers, and it makes the viewer feel that they really have no effect on any of the battle scenes. This isn’t a first person shooter simply because you don’t have a weapon. Another important technique of the camera view is to sweep around a scene and just give a brief flash of a threat and then hide it again, until of course it comes thundering back into frame. It also has the inevitable forward motion of a ride like the viewer is being pulled along by an unseen chain. Instead of this being a distraction it actually makes it easier to just sit back and enjoy the craziness.

And one of the best parts of this craziness is the excellent monster design by Raaphorst  himself that seems to have come from the fevered imagination of a kid with a bunch of monster toys and a box of military models and a lot of free time. Bits are swapped and chopped to create over-the-top creatures that seem both ridiculous and terrifying.  Bits of Nazi iconography are skillfully added to the creations to really send the message that these are the bad guys. Combine these designs with some eerie set pieces and gut churning gross outs and it makes for a fun, practical effect filled horrorshow.

There is something a bit unsettling about Frankenstein’s Army that has nothing really to do with Frankenstein himself or any of his creations. It’s the way that the Russian soldiers, supposedly our protagonists, abuse and dehumanize the German civilians that they come across. For a group of men who seem obsessed with keeping their own families safe they also have no problem being big-huge bastards to everyone they come across. There is a bit of symbolism in all this. Who’s worse, the crazy scientist who chops up people and sews them back together like pieces of meat, or the violent ideologues who use their hatred to dehumanize the enemies of their own country?

Oh well, war is hell. Just sit back and watch the movie.

Score: 4/5

Director: Richard Raaphorst Writer: Miguel Tejada-Flores Studio: Entertainment One/Dark Sky Films Run Time: 84 Minutes

Review: Noah

Written by Guest Contributor: Jefferey Pinkos I know you know the myth of Noah.  Every little Judeo-Christian boy or girl hears it a bunch of , maybe through a Sunday school teacher, maybe through a broad strokes/primary colors cartoon.  And why not, it certain speaks to us at a level we understand.  A six-hundred year old man and his family lived a good, honest, humble existence out in the country, far away from the rabble and sin of the pre-diluvian cities, when the creative deity, fed up with mankind’s dickishness, said, “FINE,” and shook Earth’s Etch-A-Sketch clean.  Then, under divine mandate, Noah built an enormous boat called an ark, and stored two of every animal on earth on board, until the coast was clear and lived a happy uncomplicated existence, minus all the survivor’s guilt and the incest just around the corner necessary for species survival.  You know, grade level stuff.

That is, more or less, Aronofsky’s Noah.  Months ago when Paramount announced the epic of Noah, audience felt more or less baffled.  What more is there to tell?  Aronofsky couched the narrative within the familiar confines of sf/fantasy/the ever popular post-apocalypse cinematic language.  In fact, if I said that the first two-thirds was like The Road and later turned into an orc battle but with Transformers, it wouldn’t feel out of place.  Think less chintzy proselytizing of Cecil B. DeMille and more a metaphor on climate change by way of Cormac McCarthy.

The first two-thirds of Noah is what you might expect from a Sunday school lesson, only with a grimmer thematic and visual emphasis.  As the famous boatbuilder Russell Crowe looks good for six-hundred, a growling bear in his performance — tame and tender with his family, hiding a snarling mean interior.  He remains the final descendent of the lineage of Seth, the mysterious third child of Adam and Eve.  The rest of everyone — read: the dicks who die — are born from Cain — read: the dick child of Adam and Eve who killed Abel, the other child of Adam and Eve — and, accordingly, behave like a bunch of murderous, warmongering, rapemongering, sinmongering, pre-Sodom and Gomorrah dicks.  Don’t worry, though.  They all die.  (“FINALLY, BECAUSE OF GENOCIDE THE WORLD IS SAVED,” the creator said, totally wrong.)

He receives the Creator’s cryptic apocryphal word, confirmed by dear doddering grandpa Methuselah (Anthony Hopkins, who’s a doll).  He and his family begin building with the help of Watchers.  (“Who are the Watchers?” you may ask.  After the Adam and Eve’s expulsion from Paradise, a band of angels fall to Earth to help them out; and because the Creator was so pissed off, cast the fallen angels in the stony earth of their new home, forever doomed to look like that rock creature from Galaxy Quest.)

The day creeps closer and closer.  A band of scavengers led by the thoroughly British Tubal-cain (Ray Winstone) seeks passage on Noah’s party boat.  Denied, they promise to return in legion.  (Cue rain battle straight out of Tolkien.)  It’s about then when we come to Aronofsky’s meat and potatoes of the picture.  Mr. Aronofsky deals in desperation and obsession as currency in his work, and here Noah’s fanaticism sours on his family’s favors. Adoptive daughter Ila (Emma Watson) informs the family, “Ayo, we pregnant up in this,” Noah goes, “Gonna throw ‘em in the sea.”  Whaaat.  What it amounts to is the conviction of Noah’s faith.  Things are cool when we allowed children to drown — a point Tubal-cain rightly mentions — but murder one of our own and it’s weird.  He finally relents.  The rains stop and land is found and he becomes a drunken wreck; but he forgives himself and his family forgives him.  Love and mercy override faith, that’s the message, as the exploding rainbows the Creator issues declare.

Its pacing is peculiar, saving the interesting material for the last third of the movie, beginning with a somber retelling of a familiar myth.  However cool your CGI menagerie looks boarding, it looks silly.  Crowe’s performance is subdued to the point of appearing flat.  His hair delivers half the story.  (Bald : MMA HXC MF :: Harry Carey hair : OH NO WATCHOUT.)  The breakout performance is Jennifer Connelly as Naameh, the faithful wife of Noah and even faithfuller mother of their children.  She plays humility, passion, anger, and fear so well she often speaks on behalf of the plot.  When Noah gets all murdermad / survivor’s guilt, Naameh’s reactions are key to watch for.  It’s not the religious epic we expected, nor the one we deserve.

Score: 2/5

Director: Darren Aronofsky Writers: Darren Aronofsky, Ari Handel Studio: Paramount Pictures Run Time: 138 Minutes

Check out the review for the graphic novel... which fared about the same!

Now On Netflix: Robinson Crusoe on Mars

Written by guest contributor Brian Roe

Perhaps due to buzz surrounding Andy Weir’s The Martian, Netflix has recently added the 1964 film Robinson Crusoe on Mars to its online collection. While Weir’s book is an in-depth, realistic examination of one person attempting to survive alone on the surface of Mars, RCoM at first comes across as a standard mid-century pulp fantasy that plays out on desert sets decorated with vast amounts of styrofoam, papier-mache, and monkey mirkins.

First off don’t bother checking this movie out if you’re one of those CGI-elitists who can’t appreciate a movie just because the effects are more of a suggestion than a true visual representation of reality. But if you dig practical effects and clever use of low budget solutions RCoM has some greatness to it.

First of we’re treated to a very young and handsome Adam West as Colonel Dan McReady, the pilot of a gravity research ship that is heading to the planet Mars. And a monkey in a monkey-sized space suit that offers no practical protection to its simian wearer in any way. We’re also introduced to Commander Christopher 'Kit' Draper (Paul Mantee), a guy who presses some buttons and says some stuff. The opening section really makes it seem like McReady is the main character and will be the Robinson Crusoe of the title. But that’s wrong so don’t even think it.

The fellows have to avoid a meteor by firing retro rockets, always with the retro rockets, and it uses up their fuel and they have to abandon ship in little escape pods. Which never would have happened if they would have listened to the monkey. (Whose name is Mona by the way.)

The escape pods don’t do a very good job and McReady is killed on impact. Luckily Mona and Draper survive which is nice. Draper goes about setting up a cozy little cave home and finding out how to breathe and stuff on Mars. Standard stuff for the Robinson Crusoe/Castaway motif. Most of his equipment looks like old war surplus and although he has a cool nylon space suit and food in squeeze tubes some of his other survival gear is extremely lacking. Like the fact that his only way to start a fire is to use a book of matches from the Kailua Klub in San Diego. Jeeze NASA, I know there were budget cuts but give the guy a Zippo or something.

This was an independent film and although parts of it really suffer for the budget it’s also very clear that a lot of work and creativity went into imagining the various settings and atmospheric effects of Mars. Many of the vistas shown are matte paintings that would make great prog-rock album covers or paintings for the sides of custom vans.

A good part of the movie is taken up by Draper figuring things out and being super patriotic and stuff. He actually whistles Yankee Doodle Dandy and after he takes the time to invent bagpipes, because every world needs bagpipes, he walks around the desert while dragging the poor monkey around and plays (I Wish I was in) Dixie really badly.

Then the mood of the film changes abruptly when Draper discovers a group of space bad guys roughing up a group of slaves by shooting at them with classic War of The Worlds manta ray spaceships. Draper rescues one of the slaves and in a total dick move names him Friday and demands that he learn English. Victor Lundin, who plays Friday, would have been an awesome Conan the Barbarian and also played the first Klingon on Star Trek. He also wrote and performed a charming little ditty about RCoM that he performed at conventions. It’s on YouTube if you want to watch it for extra credit.

Although Draper drags Friday away to safety the bad guys are able to track the slave and seem to take great pleasure in blasting apart the surface of Mars in a vain attempt to destroy him. What begins as a bit of a light hearted romp suddenly has a real sense of urgency and dread as Draper attempts to remove Friday’s tracking shackles, or Trackles™, and Friday works to keep Draper alive.

It’s at this point that RCoM starts to really hit its stride. Unfortunately the relationship that develops between Draper and Friday, and Friday and Mona, happens too late in the film to really reach the depth that it could have. But it’s still a happy ending if not overly satisfying.

The same year that RCoM was released, Gene Roddenberry was pitching Star Trek to Desilu and would go one to create Martin Luther King Jr’s favorite TV show. Fans of the original Trek will appreciate the look and feel of this movie and how it acted as a bridge between the super fluffy space shows of the 1950s and the more culturally aware Star Trek.

This is fun movie and is quite enjoyable for those willing to take off their modern movie goggles and just watch it play out. It made me realize how much the movie Enemy Mine was inspired by RCoM and makes me wonder what the inevitable movie version of The Martian will look like. And other than some casual monkey torture and long range male nudity it’s a pretty safe movie for the younglings. Make some Jiffy Pop and enjoy.

Score: 4/5

Director: Byron Haskin Writers: Ib Melchior, John C. Higgins Studio: Paramount Pictures Run Time: 110 Minutes

Review: Stoker

Written by Guest Contributor: Jefferey Pinkos India Stoker (Mia Wasikowska) spends her birthday shifting uncomfortably at the wake of father Richard (Dermot Mulroney), avoiding the gaze of a stranger who bears a mighty resemblance to the dearly departed, as he chats with the widow Evie (Nicole Kidman). Why, little India, it’s your Uncle Charlie (Matthew Goode). The reason you’ve never met him is because he’s spent years and years globetrotting, going from one exotic climate to another, yeah, yeah, that’s the ticket. And since your father just passed, and this giant ass home feels so empty without him, he will just have to stay here, to help around the house, to less than subtly ingratiate himself into the family dynamic while doing some hardcore perving on you and your mother. One mystery leads to another with Uncle Charlie, and unraveling him means unraveling yourself.

South Korean director Park Chan-wook has a well-documented history with violence. His oeuvre is filled with viciousness and obsession — including his masterstroke Oldboy. In this, his English language debut, he crafts a well groomed vision. Removed from the plot of familial intrigue, incestuous rumination, death and deception, it looks like an H&M catalogue — and depending on how you feel about those is how you’ll feel about the fashionable textures and palette Chan-wook offers here.

Stoker is a nod to Alfred Hitchcock’s Shadow of a Doubt, in which a young woman Charlie suspects her uncle, also called Charlie, of criminal activity. Here suspicion and intrigue gives way to reaction. India (okay, I’ll finally address my feelings toward her name: it’s fucking stupid) discovers early on that Charlie is up to no good, trying to make trouble in the neighborhood. It’s now a matter of how she feels about and addressing those feelings. Does it horrify her? Yes. Does it excite her? Yes. How do you reconcile feeling both desire and repulsion at once? Where’s the demarcation? Chan-wook is so devoted to delving into the theme of introspective discovery that he places the entirety of Stoker onto her discovering her taste for destruction and where it ends.

For any Hannibal fans out there, this is up your alley. India’s relationship with Stoker’s is reminiscent of Abigail Hobbs’s relationship with Hannibal Lecter’s in the first season. Hannibal and Richard both have agendas with their young, female companions — educating her in the path of sociopathic bonding, becoming their respective doting students’ teacher / father / everything else. It’s a relationship of egoism, impressing my personality onto someone else. It helps that Abigail and India are weird to begin with. It’s also reminiscent of Hannibal with a specific vision of violence, rising it to art, or at the very least intermingling aesthetics with repulsion to engage a deeper thematic meaning. And (finally cutting to the quick) both are ponderously dull and self-interested. I am not one for dryness, that much I know. I like Sam Fuller movies, where stories and emotions are big. I find little to cling on to here. Do I care about the intricacies their relationships? It’s all artifice, shallower than it portends. There’s no struggle. Go watch Martha Marcy May Marlene for a story of destruction, control, fear, complicity, and delivered by an engaged, interesting cast.

Score: 1/5

Director: Park Chan-wook Writer: Wentworth Miller Studio: Fox Searchlight Pictures Run Time: 99 min Format: Blu-Ray/DVD

Review: Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Written by Guest Contributor: Jefferey Pinkos

The S.H.I.E.L.D. of the MCU is an interesting organization.  Seemingly limitless funding - in a recovery economy no less.  A massive armory of WMDs that makes Star Wars - Reagan’s, not Lucas’s -  look medieval.  And aside one or two public forays in front of congressional subcommittees, a surprisingly minimal level of accountability.  It is one Emperor Palpatine away from becoming the evil Empire - Lucas’s, not Reagan’s.  So, the obvious logical question is, in the time since its inception during the days of Howard Stark until the first days of the Avengers Initiative, how has this globe spanning policing organization occupied its time.  History - especially that of the twentieth century - is full of horror stories.  S.H.I.E.L.D.’s role in those stories might make an interesting tale, indeed.

Like how Thor: The Dark World is a Loki movie in disguise, looking into his frayed relationships with the Asgardian royals and his next move in his all-consuming quest for power,  Captain America: The Winter Soldier is a S.H.I.E.L.D. movie in disguise, finding the ins and outs of an organization that thrives on deception and secrecy.   The New York incident stirred things up for the Avengers team.  Tony went all PTSD/fallout shelter mad.  The Nine Worlds destabilized, leaving the Asgardians became open for attack, with all of this shedding new light on Thor’s ascendancy and the throne of Asgard.  Captain America appears unfazed by the events, and has jumped back in to S.H.I.E.L.D., to his own distaste.  S.H.I.E.L.D. is spycraft through and through, and this not the best environment for Cap and his unblinking moral code.  In a le Carré-ish universe where bad and good intermingle, Steve needs to reevaluate everything.

Chris Evans shines as Rogers.  A character whose main quality upstanding virtue is a hard-sell in today’s cinematic climate.  But quality writing and Evans’s own ability adds a depth and heart to a character who, in the wrong hands, might come off as hokey.  For most of the movie he is partnered with Black Widow, in the form of Scarlett Johanson, who here is at her most casual and open.  The rapport they have is great; she ribs Steve and he jaws back.  It’s the closest to a buddy-buddy relationship the MCU has thus far (discounting Tony and JARVIS) and it works.  Their clashing moral codes (Nick Fury: “Agent Romanov is comfortable with everything.”) lends some tension to the proceedings, that is, until it’s waylaid by the bond being hunted down together provides.

The other half of the titular team is the Winter Soldier, in the form of Sebastian Stan.  Stan has little to do, acting wise, set across a few scenes here and there sprinkled in the pile of action sequences, but he’s good across the board.  In the action sequences he is the Terminator reborn, a stomping, unassailable mercenary beast.  In his Acting scenes (capital A for emphasis), he glowers with the best of them, giving off an intensity and a clarity.  An electroshock therapy scene — styled to replicate Cap’s transformation scene in The First Avenger, except in a low-rent Saw-inspired basement — watch his eyes, big and angry, as he stares a fucking hole through his caretakers, and just before the screaming, watch him chomp into a mouthpiece with a trained obedience.  In other scenes he’s a robotic mercenary, here he’s a dog.  Apparently Stan’s signed on to do god knows how many other films with Marvel, and that’s a good thing.

Fury excels as always.  Listen to him explain to Cap the new S.H.I.E.L.D. armed satellites with ease and comfort and defends it against Cap’s protests.  Is it his warning of things to come?  To quote Tony, he is the spy, his secrets have secrets.  But we have a new entrant to the proceedings, Alexander Pierce, or Robert Redford, as Fury’s boss.  Pierce is quintessentially Rumsfeldian (apologies to any conservative Bastards out there; please dismiss it as leftist bullshittery / someone who’s anxiously awaiting Errol Morris’s documentary The Unknown Known) in his threatening nonchalance.  Here is a man with an agenda and the means to see it through.

In a spoiler-filled interview with Comic Book Resources, producer Kevin Feige lays out the idea and influence that pervades Winter Soldier.  He and Marvel wanted a ‘70s era conspiracy thriller along the lines of 3 Days of the Condor, All the President's Men, and The Parallax View.  Winter Soldier is a fantastic send-up to that genre of Watergate shrouded control and fear.

Score: 5/5

Directors: Anthony and Joe Russo Writers: Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely Studio: Marvel Studios Run Time: 136 Min Release Date: 4/4/14

Group Review: Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Welcome to another comic book movie group review. Instead of scoring it, the participating writers/reviewers of Comic Bastards are just going to give their thoughts. We have plenty more Captain America: The Winter Solider for you to experience including an upcoming solo review for the film and our special edition CBMFP that went up earlier today as well. In the meantime check out what Erik, Samantha, Jordan, Dustin and Carl all thought of Marvel’s latest cinematic romp.

--- Erik:

I don’t get excited for comic book movies like I used to, but they’re still primarily why I go to the movies. I don’t seem to spend a lot of time in the theater watching movies about things that could actually happen. I think that I’ve outgrown my independent/artsy/low-budget college film student phase. You probably didn’t know that about me. Yes, I was a film student. I graduated and everything. So I do have a miniscule amount of knowledge and experience in that realm. I also know what it takes to organize and produce a film (crappy student films mind you), but films nonetheless. It’s hard work. And being able to do that and make a good film at the same time? That’s almost impossible. So the fact that Captain America: The Winter Soldier is what it is, is very impressive. This movie doesn’t just rank high on the list of comic book movies, but it will be remembered as one of the best films of a generation. I know that the compliment sounds like a lot of fluff, but I really can’t think of a better way to describe it.

Marvel has impressed me year after year with the caliber of their big budget productions. I was completely sold when I saw Avengers. I think that from then on, I knew that everything would be terrific. Now that they have this incredibly strong foundation built up, they can’t really go wrong. Now if only they could make a decent Spider-Man movie. Of course, that isn’t a Marvel Studios production.

But back to Cap, they did everything right. The evolution of the characters alone was enough to check this out. Black Widow has become an incredibly impressive addition to the team. Nick Fury has grown, and of course, Captain America has become the hero that we all knew he was and could be. The addition of the Winter Soldier storyline was a work of pure poetry. The ad people did such a good job of covering up what the movie was actually about, that I was impressed with every twist and turn. The plot seemed realistic and steady. I couldn’t see any plot holes, and trust me I had every intention of looking for them. Fortunately, there was so much going on that I didn’t really have time to see the negatives. But from an action junkie perspective, there isn’t a better looking movie out there. Captain America: The Winter Soldier was definitely a non-stop adrenaline pumping ride that will leave you wanting more. I wouldn’t be surprised if you get outside the theater and turn right back around. I almost did.

Samantha:

It isn’t any surprise that Captain America had a huge weekend. Also not a huge surprise that Ed Brubaker and Steve Epting’s comic that started it all is selling big this week too. I have to say the movie was pure awesomeness. I loved the new setting of Cap in present day. Chris Evan’s first Captain America movie wasn’t my favorite, but the next installment added everything I was looking for.

Bucky or the Winter Soldier brings in the emotional side of things, and let’s face it; Cap is a pretty emotional dude, so it fit in perfectly to him trying to find his place in the modern world. Sebastian Stan added just the right flare to the Soldier. By far the best side character was Scarlett Johansson though. Not being the biggest fan of her, I am always nervous to see how she plays in each of the Marvel movies. The Winter Soldier proved she can carry a solo one. She was badass with her moves, talk, and style. Just when I thought she wasn’t going to be a huge part of the story, she comes sweeping in giving the audience entertainment throughout. With a strong villain and a strong sidekick, I was impressed with the team the movie created. And of course Chris Evans fits in right where he belongs as Cap. Personally I love him as this character and glad he didn’t get overlooked being the Human Torch and all.

The action, although slow in the middle for some time, was explosive. It delivers on all ends from kick butt car chases to fist on face action. I did cough up the extra money to see it in 3D, only because I saw the matinee, and you could skip that part of the movie. It didn’t need it. The only cool scenes involved Falcon, but even then I would have liked his parts just as much.

All and all, I just hit on the top highlights of the movie. There are some slower parts, and Falcon needs a suit, but other than these two minor flaws the movie rocked! It will go my top list from the Marvel Universe. Oh and obviously the after the credits scene was pretty rad too. Totally stoked to see where the third installment will take us.

Jordan:

Captain America: The Winter Solider is kind of a dream come true. Never in the history of a superhero film have I felt more transported into the tripped-out, life-is-drugs mentality of a kid and his action figures. Not only that, but aside from all the muscle-bound action splendor and high-budget set pieces, there’s a damn good story here, a simple one, but a good one. But, really it’s the characters themselves that shine most in this Cap film. Christopher Markus and Stephen McFeely do such a good job in this regard that even weaker roster members of the other franchise movies (be they due to under development or underuse in plot) like Black Widow and auxiliary characters like Falcon are damn likable and honed to perfection here. I`ve never liked Sam Jackson`s Nick Fury this damn much, he finally gets the treatment he deserves as a cold, cunning black ops badass and Anthony Mackie`s Falcon goes from being “that gimmicky looking character with the metal bird wings on the poster” to “yeah, I totally hope he comes back regularly.” This film does it right.

The Winter Solider himself is freaky and intense, being set up first as an urban legend that we don’t fully see until nearly half way through the film, when we do though its full tilt bad as hell and some of the fights between ol` Winty and Cap will make you have to reign back a HOLY FUCK! In the theatre.

I literally can’t think of a major fault in The Winter Solider, it did everything it needed to and a little bit more, surprising me by making its supporting cast some of the most likable characters in the Marvel Cinematic Universe after its 136 minute running time. If you like comics, go and treat yourself to this movie.

Dustin:

I’ll keep it short since you can actually listen to me, Kevin and Erin talk about this on a special episode of the podcast. My thoughts, it’s the best solo character movie in the Marvel Cinema U. That said as much as it was about Captain America, it wasn’t about Captain America and that was fine. Let’s be honest, the most interesting part of his journey is over. He’s in the modern era and now he just needs to fight, fight, fight for what’s right.

Two things that surprised me was Falcon and that other spoilerish thing. I didn’t expect them to engage a storyline that took years to execute in the comics, in just one movie. It’s interesting and shows that maybe the films have more guts to change the status quo than the comics. As for Falcon, wow. Not only did he play a relevant role in the movie, but he wasn’t annoying. He didn’t come across like War Machine in which he’s forced upon the story and never really does anything that Starks couldn’t just do on his own. It was a good angle.

It wasn’t much of a surprise, but the Black Widow rocked throughout the film. Other than her annoying dating gimmick, she became a fully fleshed out character and yet given room to grow in the future. It’s definitely worth seeing at least once.

Carl:

This movie finally made Captain America a significant character.

Chris Evans can be an outstanding actor; just watch Danny Boyle’s Sunshine to get an example of his prowess.  I never thought he was a great Cap, though.  He always came off as flat and stilted.  In The Avengers, Joss Wheddon’s dialogue fleshed Captain America out and gave him more of a leader role akin to the comic character.  But that was the dialogue and not the acting.

The Winter Soldier provided a platform for Evans to make the character more dimensional against a backdrop of some amazing action and intrigue.  And this film sold me on how great a character Captain America can be.

Still adjusting to life after the thaw, Steve Rogers takes time to understand this world while making a few friends along the way.  He will need those friends because Hydra, his mortal enemy from the first film, still lurks in the shadows.

I went in to this film having seen as little about it as possible, save for some trailers.  That made all the difference.  Therefore, I won’t spoil any more of the plot so as to permit you the best experience possible.

What I will say is that this film exceeds the genre of mere comic book movie by being intelligent, well-acted, and excellently paced.

The crux of the plot focuses on the issue of America’s fascination with intelligence gathering and control.  As stated in the dialogue, we gladly sacrifice freedom for safety—and we don’t understand the ramifications of that.

Captain America never comes off as holier-than-thou.  He admits that his generation committed acts that made it difficult to sleep at night, yet those acts were done with the intention of the others.  In today’s world, security seems to be to favor those who wish to use information against us or to claim power, and that is criticism that is true and unexpected from a popcorn film.

As mentioned, Evans brings depth to Cap.  Steve Rogers flirts with his neighbor to awkward results.  When visiting his Army training grounds, his faces emotes the pain/fondness of his bygone era.  And when he acts opposite A-list celeb Robert Redford who chews a little scenery, Evans as Cap holds his own.

I might be the lone voice, but I don’t like Scarlett Johansen as Black Widow.  She seems to prim and proper, and she does not convey Romanoff’s haunted past with her beautiful doe eyes.

Only a few elements of the story made me grimace, and one part of the film was predictable.  While Captain America also slightly suffers from the same malady as Thor and other Marvel films (namely that nothing really changes at the conclusion of the films) the end of this movie felt like a significant course direction for Captain America.

The Russo brothers helmed this film, and the action moves like a Bourne movie.  The writing staff consisted of talent that worked on some of the Narnia movies, yet their script came off as though written by a Ludlum or Clancy.

Please see this film on the big screen.  It is well worth it.  Of all the stand-alone Marvel films, this has been the equal—if not the superior—to the first Iron Man.  While this is no Nolan film it has kicked off the summer movie season in the best possible way.

Chris Evans, I thank you and the crew for making a movie worth the admission price while also giving me a lot to think about.  Kudos and much success to you all. --- Directors: Anthony and Joe Russo Writers: Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely Studio: Marvel Studios Run Time: 136 Min Release Date: 4/4/14

Review: Grand Piano

Written by Guest Contributor: Jefferey Pinkos If you know about Grand Piano you know some of the following things.  (1)  It’s influenced by either Alfred Hitchcock, Brian DePalma, or both.  (2)  The plot is something out of a James Bond villain’s bottom barrel schemes.  (3)  It’s like Speed, but with a piano; or it’s like Phone Booth, but with a piano; or it’s like a number of movies where the main dude has another main dude pointing a gun at him and making him do stuff, but with a piano.

If you don’t know about Grand Piano it boils down to this.  Tom Selznick, played by Elijah Wood, is the world’s greatest piano-man, and tonight’s his first live appearance after a nervous breakdown five years earlier.  On stage early into the performance Selznick finds a note written into his sheet music, in dramatic red ink: “Play one wrong note and you die.”  A sniper, played by John Cusack, located somewhere in the concert hall’s rafters has pinpointed Mr. Selznick and his piano-manning ability for his nefarious purposes.  Flub a note, dead.  Alert anyone, dead.  Defy Mr. Cusack in any way, dead.  It’s, more or less, that stretched over the length of movie.

That invites some questions.  Who is Mr. Cusack, and what are his intentions with Mr. Wood?  What assassin is that interested in a live orchestration?  Can a premise this outlandish, this Bond villain level craziness, find a treatment that retains the tension for over an hour without losing its muster?

Fortunately, Piano’s strength comes from its director Eugenio Mira and the script from its writer Damien Chazelle.  The film spends its time inside the concert hall, and thanks to Mira’s eye for imagery, it’s never dull.  The colors are vibrant (the glaring red screams danger), and the shots are interesting and point toward some of DePalma’s (whose work this film is reminiscent of) work.  You can see Phantom of the Paradise in Piano’s DNA.  Chazelle’s script has no slack to speak of.  Here he turned a laughable premise and wrung it dry, turning it into, ripping off another critic here, a pulp symphony.

Despite Mira and Chazelle’s best efforts, the premise catches up with them and forces them to make some concession to the plot.  Why this?  Because this.  Cusack’s assassin’s concern with Wood’s performance has a motivation and it’s touched on, but it’s never ever resolved.  Say the piano defused a bomb (not it; just an example), his motivation is tangible for the audience to do what he’s doing has some grounding.  The last shot of the movie issues no resolution.  It’s no miracle piano, except as MacGuffiny as it is, never addressing it renders the tension from the previous hour and change inconsequential.

Its impressive plot and I look forward to more work by Mr. Mira and Mr. Chazelle.  Grand Piano is strong and overcomes the plots mostly.

Score: 3/5

Director: Eugenio Mira Writer: Damien Chazelle Distributors: Magnet Releasing Run Time: 90 min. Release Date: 3/7/14

Review: Cheap Thrills

Written by Guest Contributor: Jefferey Pinkos To my knowledge there aren’t any grand narratives on the Great Recession, nothing that encapsulates what it means to have lived through it.  Other collective economic traumas — the Great Depression, the recessions of the ’70s, ’80s, and ‘90s — pushed people outward, toward the fringes of desperation, and pushed too far, people snapped or folded.  See They Live and Falling Down as examples of desperation cinema.

In Cheap Thrills we get more desperation cinema at its basic.  A chance meeting in a bar reunites estranged high school friends, both of whom live on the fringes of subsistence: Craig (Pat Healy), a recent father who’s newly unemployed and facing eviction, and Vince (Ethan Embry), an ex-con who earns a meager living collecting on loans by doing despicable acts.  The two friends meet a wealthy couple (David Koechner and Sara Paxton), who are looking for a good time.  A game is introduced; perform X action first, get Y amount of dollars.  First is penny-ante stuff:  doing a shot, induce a woman into slapping you, slapping a woman’s ass, punching a bouncer.  Soon, the foursome retreats to the couple’s palatial home, where the game progresses to dramatic heights.  The bonds of friendship dissolve in a survivalist squabble for safety and security.  It’s Bum Fights meets Saló.

Without giving too much away, I can say that it’s an experience.

Cheap Thrills is no great parable for our age.  It never strives to be one.  It’s a mean bastard, unrelenting  and unforgiving. with its neo-Marxist indictment of a codified system of income inequality, implicating the audience in its machinations.  The audience is here for the violence and degradation.  We may not be the ones footing the bill, but we are sitting back and watching.

Oh, and it’s funny too.

Score: 4/5

Director: E.L. Katz Writers: David Chirchirillo, Trent Haaga Studio: Drafthouse Films Release Date: 3/21/14

Review: Veronica Mars

Written by Guest Contributor: Jefferey Pinkos The story is old now.  Rob Thomas, creator/director/writer for the cancelled TV show, opened a Kickstarter account in the hopes of creating a cinematic continuance of our favorite teen sleuth and got blanketed with money.  Now the movie’s available in VOD and in theaters, for your perusal.  To see it, it provides evidence to one of two theories to determine the future of movie financing.  (1) We will be buried with the studio system, no matter how innovative we get, no matter how hard we try.  (2)  “Off with studio execs’ heads!!  Bring back Firefly!!”  So on, so on.

Because it’s such an intriguing financial model, we here at Comic Bastards interviewed someone integral to the process, a donor, Jefferey Pinkos.

-      Hi, Jeff.  Hi. -      Is it more of the same?  Yes.  We get a mystery, we get the Neptune regulars — Veronica, Keith, Weevil, Logan, Piz — -      Piz?  Yeah, I know.  At the beginning of the movie they’re together. -      But later they aren’t.  Well, one, spoilers.  Two, duh.  But I’ll get back to it in a sec. -      Sure.  Sorry for interrupting.  She’s with Piz, she’s a law school grad on her way to becoming a lawyer, he works for Ira Glass. -      For real?  Yeah, I know.  Anyway, Logan is back in the news, because he’s suspected of killing his pop star girlfriend.  She rushes back to Neptune, to get some of that good-good and to, um, publicly exonerate him, too.  She finds him changed; he’s a soldier now — forever solidifying his good intentions to her.  At that moment, it’s counting down to them boning. -      Aww.  Yeah, I mean I shipped them on the show, but for different reasons.  They could never work.  He acted out, she loved and hated it; blah blah blah.  Put simply:  It was interesting because it could never work out, despite everyone’s best efforts.  It helped that every other boyfriend she had was so terribly underwritten.  Take Piz — he liked music, he liked Veronica, that’s all we know — even after the movie, where he came off pretty well, I think,  he likes NPR and he likes Veronica.  Whereas Logan fought and relished in his father’s — by extension his own — fame.  He loves Veronica, and he loved Lilly.  Here, mere days after his girlfriend’s death, we see him lusting.  It feels so inconsequential.  That may be because of the format — he could appear brooding for an episode, ten minutes airtime tops, and we get it.  The plot’s demands don’t have to upend the emotional reality. -      Okay, but do they end up?  Sigh.  Yes, and it’s awkward.  It feels so eventual that when it happens, its muster just dissipates.  Everyone’s sure it’s happening.  Piz breaks up with her over the phone, like, really anticlimactically.  “You like Logan, duh.  I have no agency.  I am only the nice boyfriend.  I have no personality beyond the scope of my archetype.  My name’s Piz.”  Also, it’s like ten minutes after a truck hits her father and kills Deputy Sacks. -      OH WHAT SPOILERS.  What?  You had me spell out all the entire relationship stuff, but when some tertiary character beefs it, you get weird? -      Sorry.  Something in my eye.  Uh, plot.  How’s that?  It’s fine?  Again, the problems of compressing what would be a season-long plot into, what, two hours, is that it feels rushed.  The season-long arc could be brought forefront or relegated to a minor mention in an episode as the plot works.  What the show did incredibly well is create a mystery’s effects on the community.  Look at season three’s serial rapist plot.  It worked because it stuck itself into the firmament of Hearst College and lingered and affected how everyone acted with one another.   Here, all we have is the murder plot and Logan/Veronica’s Inevitable Romance. -      What else is new?  Everyone’s good in their parts.  Veronica is Veronica, Keith is Keith, et cetera.  No one has changed.  Logan slapped on a Navy Uniform of Personality Change which effectively neuters him from his volatile interest.  He’s snarky, but there’s no danger.  He’s an adult now, which I guess is good. -      So any notes for people who want to see it?  It’s incomplete.  The main plot is resolved, but there are two other plots that begin here when they really shouldn’t.  These C- and D-plots (corruption in Neptune constabulary, who hit Keith and Sacks; Weevil got shot and someone forged evidence, why) should have complicated things for Ms. Mars.  But she rightly moves them to the back burner, just like Rob Thomas should have. -      Boom.  Boom. -      Thanks for talking to us.  Any time.

Score: 2/5

Writer/Director/Creator: Rob Thomas Studio: WB Release Date: 3/14/14

Review: Scooby-Doo: Wrestlemania Mystery

Did you ever wonder what would happen if you took the epic force that is Scooby-Doo and combine the pure entertainment power that is the WWE? I know the very thought has kept me up at night. Thank the wrestling Gods thatScooby-Doo! Wrestlemania Mystery is a thing! On the outskirt of WWE City (The home of everything WWE) the Miz is listening to head phones while jogging; down the road Kane appears. Shocked that Kane has returned The Miz avoids the confrontation with the Big Red Machine until a mysterious ghost bear appears and wreaks havoc.

Meanwhile, Shaggy and Scooby are playing a WWE video game. Scooby does so well that he unlocks the super secret ending that gives them passes to WWE City. The boys are stoked and convince the rest of the team to go. On the way to WWE city the van runs off the road in attempt to avoid a small wood land creature. But don’t fret because the trainer Cookie (former jaded Superstar) and his son Ruben (wants to be a superstar) are chaperoning Jon Cena on his late night run out side of the city (Even though there are a series of rampart ghost bear attacks).  Anyway, Shaggy and Scoob “mark out” for Cena and Mr. Thung-a-nomics gives them free passes to the wrestling show, while Daphne gets “Real Thirsty” for Cena.

At the show Mr. McMahon introduces the vacant World Championship belt. He tells the WWE Universe that there will be a new champion at Wrestlemania. Later as the group receives the nickel tour of WWE city the Championship belt disappears and it looks like Scooby is to blame! What? Not Scooby!

The sole reason that this movie was even made is an easy one. The WWE has a PG status that is more family friendly. It’s great for the company that is chasing a younger audience and needs more exposure. What’s better than having a father who grew up on SD and WWF/WWE pass it on to his younglings?  That’s another reason why Jon Cena is featured, other than being the face of the company; he’s kid friendly. As is Sin Cara, kids love the mask and superhero type of presentation that some Lucha can deliver.  Then there’s AJ Lee who has a slew of young female fans, The Miz who is actually a decent source of comedy relief, Brodus Clay and Santino are in for their catch phrase and dumb snake gimmick, Triple H for his facial hair…actually I have no idea why he made the cut, my guess is it’s for his kids to see him, Kane as the brooding imitation factor, Michael Cole on color so kids can hate him too and of course Mr. McMahon for the clout.

As for the animation, it’s well done. The wrestles resemble their real life counter parts. There are sprinkles of CGI here and there but nothing too out of control. It’s mostly used to enhance the action scenes. There is also select music from a few superstars’ entrance themes that add to the experience and spice up montages.  The voice acting does its job and believe it or not Jon Cena and The Miz actually do a good job. There are flares of their personality that actually sneak out.

For the gang, I was really taken back how worthless everyone was. Fred said maybe ten things, Velma did her part in kicking the knowledge, but Daphne was really out of control. She was dick riddin’ SO hard it was sad. I was very embarrassed for Fred. He needs to put her in check on the hurry.

Overall there is some enjoyment to be had with Scooby-Doo! WrestleMania Mystery for the kids. I will say it leans more to the WWE fan due to the fact that it is drenched in WWE everything. In past Scooby-Doo adventures, things would take place in exotic locations with the guest stars in tow. But I guess it all depends on what you take from it. It worked for me because I’m that wrestling fan demo graphic.  Regardless you shouldn’t over-analyze the self-aware humor or the small continuity flubs. If you look beyond all of that then you might have a good time.

Score: 3/5

Director: Brandon Vietti Writer: Michael Ryan Studio: Warner Bros. Animation Release Date: 3/25/14

Review: The Raid 2

It’s clear from the opening scene of The Raid 2 that the film has every intention of surpassing its processor by delivering beautiful cinematics, memorable character and a story full of life. It goes on to show its next evolution of gunplay and cinematic martial arts which also contributes to The Raid 2 following a natural and wonderful evolution from the original Raid. The story picks up just after the events of the first film and while that doesn’t seem possible, it is and it makes sense with the story. Rama and his surviving officers turn to another police unit to essentially protect them and cover up their involvement with the events of the first film. Rama is asked to join the group and go undercover which he declines… that is until his family is affected by a new mobster Bejo.

Rama goes undercover, but the catch is that he will need to get there by nefarious deeds that can’t be faked. His goal while in prison is to get close to Uco, the son of the gangster Bangun. This isn’t too difficult of a task as Rama (now called Yuda) plays hard to get, but then prevents Uco from being killed during a massive prison riot orchestrated for the sole purpose of taking Uco’s life.

Months in prison turn into years as Yuda (Rama) is released and picked up by Uco who is excited to have him meet and work for his father. While his protection of Uco on the inside has earned him some good faith, Yuda must still play the role and go on collections with Yuda as an enforcer and prove himself.

The movie runs almost three hours, but unlike some epic fantasy films you won’t even notice. The reason being that it’s an action film offering you everything that’s great about the genre: story, characters, gunplay, ultra-violence and martial arts.

Writer, director and editor Gareth Evans delivers an incredible film. There is no aspect of this film that is unaccounted for. The cinematography is incredible and that doesn’t just apply to the way that the violence was filmed, but to the entire look of the film. The first film was restrained by budget and location, but with The Raid 2 the handcuffs are off. There is an incredible amount of wonderful looking shots. One of the opening scenes with Rama in prison has him sitting in a bathroom stall with an angry mob outside waiting to greet him. The camera begins with a focus on Rama and then spins up to a god-cam view to show Rama and the door that separates him from the mob. There were countless other scenes with brilliant camera rotations or textbook shots that were executed expertly.

Another aspect of Evans’ direction and his ability to create a memorable world is the characters. Some of them are just solid actors that deliver impressive performances, while others are memorable for other reasons. Characters like Baseball Bat Man, Hammer Girl, The Assassin (Cecep Arif Rahman) and Bejo stand out because of their design or presence. Bejo has a trademark look of a black jacket, cane, black gloves and sunglasses. He’s never out of this look; his sunglasses are never taken off and because of that you remember him no matter what. In the case of Baseball Bat Man, he’s memorable because of his actions. Hitting a baseball so hard that it kills a man or becomes embedded in a wall is enough to remember him, but then Evans added in the extra personality trait of asking for his ball back from his intended target. As you can imagine aspects like this make every character that has a role in the film is memorable.

Martial Arts films have largely been on the decline with a few exceptions popping up and beginning to fill the void left by the likes of Jackie Chan and Jet Li. Iko Uwais who plays Rama, has the potential to be a huge martial arts star if he continues to take roles like The Raid and The Raid 2. The main reason being that he can act, but when the time comes to throw down he can do that as well. For the most part he’s back with his formidable pencak silat style, but the fight scenes are larger and more incredible.

While the violence and choreography on the scenes is fantastic, it’s actually the final martial arts scene that is the most spectacular. Uwais’ battle with Cecep Arif Rahman is stunning, but more so it shows that wires aren’t a substitute for real skill. To give a strange example it reminded me of Jackie Chan’s Young Master in which Chan asked a talented martial artist to be in the film because he wanted to fight him and produce an incredible scene. To this day I use that scene as the bench mark for fight scenes and Uwais and Rahman’s scene surpasses that mark.

One of the impressive things about the first film was its mixture of gunplay with martial arts and the Raid 2 is no slouch in this department either. Film in general has embraced a realistic view towards guns when it comes to bullet count. No more are the days of John Woo and the infinite ammo supply. Guns don’t dominate the movie, but Evans finds plenty of unique uses for them that make for stunning ultra-violent scenes.

To talk about the gunplay is to bring up the sound. In that regard the sound engineer is much like the letterer of a comic book in which they’re an unsung hero. The reason for noting it here is because there’s a huge focus on the sound in the film. At times it’s the lack of sound, but other times it’s the intensity of the gunshots and the ambience that it creates that makes the film immersive.

In some ways The Raid 2 represents what can be created when you give a competent creator the control and budget to produce their vision. Granted that’s not always the case, but with Gareth Evans it most certainly is. There is too much to take away from this film; from the storytelling, the action, the cinematography; it’s the complete package. It’s rare that sequel surpasses the original and even rarer when it’s one person responsible for the writing, directing and editing, but Evans has done just that. Even though this is a sequel, Evans has managed to create a film that can be watched, enjoyed and understood on its own; and that is what a true sequel should be… its own film.

Score: 5/5

Writer/Director/Editor: Gareth Evans Distributor: Sony Picture Classics Release Date: 3/28/14

Review: RoboCop (2014)

Written by Guest Contributor: Jefferey Pinkos This is late in coming. Sorry, I’m new.

RoboCop 2014 isn’t RoboCop 1987.  That merits some mention.  José Padilha’s remake sidesteps the messiness of Paul Verhoeven’s original, the sneering tone and the giddy violence.  The original confronts audiences with the beastly dehumanizing effects of Reagan-era law and order and the rule of private industry.  The remake is, or tries to be, a serious and emotional meditation on drone warfare and prostheses.  Trouble is Verhoeven’s messiness gave his RoboCop a heart, and Padilha’s own messiness takes away from the points he tries to make.

RoboCop 2014 changes focus from the original, which employed Alex Murphy (Peter Weller) as the main source of action with the occasional diversion.  Here, RoboCop 2014 introduces a set of previously unseen characters, the creative team behind RoboCop which includes CEO Michael Keaton, the sensitive prosthetics guy Gary Oldman, and a bunch of hangers on that don’t warrant mention (including you, Jay Baruchel; jk jk we’re good).  RoboCop gives OmniCorp executive class equal time to Joel Kinnaman’s workable performances as Alex Murphy badass cop / Alex Murphy badass RoboCop.  They explain situations.  They explain that, oh, his emotions.  They explain that, puts some sedatives here, damn it.  Their scenes explain what’s going on with Alex Murphy while nodding to their overriding concern, that if this fucks up they will have less money.  These scenes are fairly economical as plot delivery devices.

Because Padilha pushes Murphy’s story to the side, or thinking it required some sort of bionic exposition suit, what he gives us is scraps of stories.  Cops are gun-running.  The mob guy orders a hit.  Dude blows up.  He gets revenge in, like, ten minutes, like it was nothing, like it was going to the Starbuck and picking up a quad-pump espresso.  It was that simple.  That story is negligible to the story Padilha wants to tell; just a means to an end.  What he cares about is family drama.  We get a dozen scenes of weepy family stuff (who seem to only exist to give the dude pathos; that said it is the greatest gift a family can provide).  We get a banality of evil story in the OmniCorp exposition group, that shoots to a climax with Michael Keaton on a rooftop, with a gun trained on Murphy’s stupid pathos family, that feels unearned.

Is he evil because he’s ruthless?  Is it the notion of self-interested, ambitious Tea Party jag off Randians are just dicks?  That could reason out why Sam Jackson’s conservative scenes exist in the first place.  But no, there’s no cohesion.  Alex Murphy is a knight treated like a pawn, not just by OmniCorp, but also by Padilha’s treatment.

Someone online noted that Padilha’s thesis statement for RoboCop 2014 is a early, plot-less scene where Gary Oldman the prosthetist watches on as a patient with a new bionic hand plays the guitar beautifully before inevitable fumbling.  The patient’s emotions are conflicting with the bionics, and he needs the emotions to play.  It is a frustrating limbo he exists in.  Murphy undergoes the same procedure for his entire body.  The dialectic between life and artifice.  The beauty and terror of being human.  It’s a shame that story wasn’t told.

Again, sorry, this is late coming in.  Either you’ve seen it, or you won’t.  If you have, yeah, sorry.  If you haven’t, continue doing that.

Score: 2/5

Director: José Padilha Writer: Joshua Zetumer Studio: Sony Pictures Release Date: 2/14/14

Review: Unidentified

Unidentified falls into the found footage film category. Its budget is significantly lower than other films that have blazed the same path like Cloverfield or Chronicle. To be clear I have nothing against found footage films; yes the camera shakes and that can be annoying and even headache inducing, but for the most part Unidentified manages as well as the any other film that’s tackled the genre. The main thing that Unidentified does is show that regardless of the budget the film, the quality ends up about the same. Sure there might be more mayhem and destruction in the previous two films I mentioned, but all three films manage to hit the same story beats and generally have the same problems with their narrative. The narrative is uninteresting. We spend the bulk of the movie hanging out and humanizing the characters when we’re all just there for the third act.

The majority of the opening is spent with the character Jodie who is the instigator of the filming for this film. He’s a fan of superheroes and that’s to say that he’s not a comic book fan, but a fan of comic book characters i.e. superheroes. We spend far too long with him as he sets the stage for the camera’s relevance in the story as he opens his own YouTube channel.

We quickly learn that he’s going on a trip to Vegas with his boss, brother in-law and a co-worker. This is after he records two more short videos while his boss hammers on the horn in his drive way. I believe this is there to illustrate that Jodie has no consideration for anyone else’s time and to pretty much burn away all sympathy for his character as he takes a road trip with three people whose feelings for him range from dislike to utter apathy. Jodie is the naïve, annoying character that’s picked on by the people forced to tolerate him because he’s annoying. You’ll want to feel sorry for him at times, but then he’ll do something particularly annoying and you’ll no longer feel sorrow for him. The only time he’s not acting like a hyperactive child is when he has an encounter with an object in the desert, but we’ll get to that.

With a title like Unidentified you’d assume that the film is not only dealing with alien’s, but that it will be spending a great deal of time dealing with those aliens. Unfortunately only the former of the two is true. The first two acts of the film are spent picking up the characters, driving and some really boring Vegas stuff. There’s a scene in an abandoned neighborhood that’s particularly pointless and in several ways breaks the plot of the third act of the movie.

The third act that actually deals with aliens and such is not intense and basically ends up being four men wandering the desert. The three men that were once annoyed with Jodie are now his protectors and the shift is too hard to believe.

The acting isn’t terrible, but at times it feels as if the characters are improving their dialogue and if they’re not then the dialogue needed more work. Part of you while watching the film will think this is just The Hangover with four people and aliens and maybe that was the intention, but it does not succeed. The primary reason being that none of the actors have any chemistry with each other; they instead come across as four strangers that meet and filmed a movie. It’s even more apparent during the cliché angry wife and cliché idiot husband scene which spills out into a scene with awkward fake sister and awkward fake brother. In total, four out of the five characters we spend time with are related by blood or marriage and none of that feels genuine.

The film suffers from pacing problems. As I mentioned in the beginning it’s no better or worse than big-budget films that have done the same genre, but that doesn’t make it any better either. There’s far too much build-up to get to the aliens and really everything that happens up to that point is mundane. It’s nothing that hasn’t been done before and the attempts at humor fall short because it’s found footage. By the time you get to the alien stuff it’s sadly too late to hold your interest, but what’s worse is that the film continues down the same uninteresting path it started on.

The other problem with the story is that there’s far too much focus on why the camera is there, why the camera is running and yet everyone looks into the camera every chance they get or worse yet they ignore it as if they were in a real movie. I understood that it was a found footage film from the first scene, but then the film explains why the camera is there not once, but two more times. You could even argue that there’s a third time, but that was more a break in the plot than anything else. Basically Jodie is the camera and though the camera passes hands, he’s still the camera and everyone takes a turn explaining why they’re responsible for him being on the trip.

Again, it’s not a bad film. The quality is actually very good, more than likely due to the leap in camera and editing technology. Its failure as a film is that it doesn’t try to do anything new. Everything here is something you’ve seen or experienced yourself (referring to the Vegas trip not aliens) which makes it dull to watch, but at least it’s viewable.

Score: 2/5

Writer/Director: Jason R. Miller Studio: Dark Sky Films Run Time: 89 Minutes Rating: Not Rated

Review: Justice League: War

I am going to bring to light two critical low points of this DC Animated feature at the very start of my review: one is Wonder Woman’s episode of having a near orgasmic experience tasting ice cream for the first time; the second is the countless repeat of  Superman met Batman. If you can understand the reason why I identified those two points in this film as low points, then you will understand my disappointment in this feature.

The story is based on the “New 52” reboot of the DC Comic Universe.  That means the characters that we have known all along are reintroduced in new ways.  Captain Marvel (who goes by the name “Shazam”) exudes electrical energy, which is pretty cool.  Superman, though, comes off as cold, distant, and arrogant.  Nothing in his character reflects the tragic nature of his past that would make him humble and, well, Super.  Billy Batson is a brat who steals, and that’s just so damned uncharacteristic that it hurts to watch.  The one saving grace was the inclusion of Cyborg in a larger role.  I enjoyed his role as a member of the JL, but I felt his presence was nothing more than a walking computer to offer exposition when needed.

Wonder Woman, the star of one of the best and most underrated DC Animated features, has been reduced to the one-dimensional brute man in a woman’s body role.  The aforementioned ice cream scene, as well as an opening event dealing with a gender-confused man protesting her presence, undermines the strength of the character from the onset.

Don’t expect the familiar voices that have become staples for viewing.  Kevin Conroy and Tim Daly, the two best reasons for watching DC Animated films, have been replaced by a lifeless Jason O’Mara and an uncharacteristically flat Alan Tudyk.  The saving grace is that the greatest voice director ever, Andrea Romano, manages to pull out decent performances.  And as a brief side note, my mind kept imposing Nathan Fillion voiceovers every time Green Lantern spoke.  While I understand the key actors aren’t always available, I feel that DC needs to stick with what works.  Make the sacrifice to keep the quintessential parts of the DC Universe (their voices, at least) in place.

Yes, great characters are assembled for this reboot of the DC Universe that, frankly, should not be rebooted.  Well-selected villains such as Darkseid, Desaad, and the Parademons offer challenge to our heroes.  However, Darkseid doesn’t carry any of the menace or threat he did in the gripping Superman/Batman: Apocalypse.  Here, Darkseid is more of a blunt instrument conqueror with none of the character or imposing presence to make him worth of the entire Justice League’s collected response.

The art does look good and mimics the anime styling introduced back in Batman: Gotham Knight.  Altered with the influences of the “New 52” character designs, the revised versions of Superman, Cyborg, Darkseid, and Wonder Woman look fine.  Characters like Flash and Green Lantern had little or no change.  So overall, the look of the film is not a distraction.

The story, though, offers nothing more than a platform to reintroduce the key members of the Justice League and provide them with a reason to assemble.  Okay, that’s a good vehicle, but it has been done ad nauseum.  The remainder of the story shifts focus between Batman, Shazam, and Cyborg.  The others are reduced to support functions, and the poor Flash just punches things fast.

I may be approaching this review with a hyper-critical eye.  The assortment of animated features from DC have been great to superior, and Marvel has yet to match even the most average DC Animated offering.  With such a rich history of work that dates back to Batman: The Animated Series, DC has established itself as a quality producer of animated work.  We hold them to high standards because they have made the standards high.

The close of the film ends with an attempt at humor that falls terribly flat.  When asked by the president what the newly formed group would call itself, Shazam says it will be the “Super Seven.”  Granted, this may be humor aimed at kids, but this isn’t a kids’ movie.  That’s evident by the violence (Darkseid gets his eyes gouged out) and the language.  Cyborg pulls a Bumblebee and drops the ‘S’ bomb.  I didn’t mind, but the language conflicted with the goofy, kid-level gaffes peppered throughout the movie.

While watchable, War falls short of the quality produce offered from DC.  I don’t feel let down like most Marvel animated features, but I feel that other source material deserves attention.  Please, DC, let Guillermo Del Toro do the “Justice League Dark” movie with all the supernatural characters.  It’s a great concept!

Score: 1/5

Director: Jay Olivia Writer: Heath Corson (based on Geoff Johns and Jim Lee’s Justice League Origin) Studio: WB Price: $15.99 Blu-Ray Release Date: 2/4/14

Review: Marvel Knights - Wolverine Versus Sabretooth

I’ve reviewed each of Shout Factory’s Marvel Knights animations and with each one I find myself saying the same thing over and over. The thing is I can’t judge the story because it’s a straight adaptation of the comic book. It’s basically just a motion comic done right and while it generally works, there’s usually a few rough spots. In the case of Wolverine Versus Sabretooth it’s the mixture of action and narration. You will be amazed by how much Wolverine narrates. It honestly becomes the most annoying thing about the story as writer Jeph Loeb recaps the previous issue each time. I remember being annoyed with that while reading the comic and so having Wolverine say all that exposition was pretty daunting. The sad truth is that there isn’t a lot of dialog or conversations in this animation; it’s all Wolvie talking directly to you. Like he’s watching the footage with you and he just won’t shut up. It’s like, “enough Logan… let’s just watch the movie.”

As for the action, Simone Bianchi’s style is probably one of the worst styles for this type of project that I could ever imagine. He’s a brilliant illustrator, but his work does not translate to animation. There’s a scene with Sabretooth scrambling to leave that they use twice and it’s ridiculous looking. He ends up looking like a paper mouse in a maze. There were times that it worked, but overall there would be these awkward moments of action that would hurt the animation more than help it.

To speak of the story, it’s terrible. It was a terrible choice because it takes place during so many Marvel events that even with Loeb’s abbreviated recap, an unexperienced comic reader is sure to be a little lost. The problem with this story is Loeb; he came on the book and did his usual Marvel twist, which is to say he broke something beyond repair because he thought it would be interesting. Well it made Wolverine not a mutant and then no one fucking cared to follow up with that bullshit so he’s mostly considered a mutant still. Sure they’ve ruined him further since, but it’s because of this story line that everything that followed was able to happen.

The reason I keep reviewing and following these animations is because I think they are actually good for comics. Every non-comic reader I show them to asks questions and wants to know more and in a way because there is so much happening in the story’s universe it helps hook them on the endless cycle of storytelling that comics are known for. The problem is that it then becomes someone else’s job to tell them where to pick up after the animation turns off.

If Marvel was smart about it they would choose titles that have a follow up. Only two of these animations have a follow up, but the others will never have a follow up. If you watched and liked Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk then you’re never going to have a follow up because the comic took a ridiculous amount of time to conclude and the landscape of the universe was destroyed by none other than Jeph Loeb.

It’s not a bad animation, but it’s not great either. The narration and Wolverine’s boring voice acting wear on you quickly and really they should have trimmed down Loeb’s original story since it was drawn out just to highlight Bianchi’s artwork which isn’t the star of this animation. There’s a lot of choices that should have been made differently on this one.

Score: 2/5

Studios: Marvel Knights Animation/ShoutFactory Price: $14.97 Release Date: 1/14/14

Review: R.I.P.D.

Ryan Reynolds will go down in the film history book for “playing the most comic book characters on screen.” This achievement will be listed first only so that he’s second achievement of “ruining the most comic book characters on screen” will have context. The strange thing is that Reynolds basically spends the entire movie not being… well Reynolds. He mostly succeeds in this, but the character that comes from it is something worse… average and worse, not very believable.

Sure he’s sarcastic in the film, but he’s also angry which cancels out the humor of the sarcasm. In fact he plays the movie angry the entire time or at least when he’s allowed to talk. Jeff Bridges actually takes on the bulk of the exposition and seemingly never shuts up. This isn’t that bad considering Bridges performance is the most tolerable in the film. The problem with his character is that like my friends dad once said, “He’s just playing Rooster Cogburn.” That is the most spot on description of his performance and while it’s enjoyable it definitely adds to the movies “haven’t I already seen this before” vibe.

That’s what the entire movie suffers from, unoriginality. At first glance of the trailers it screams Men in Black, which is accurate considering the comic book that the film is based on released when the first film was buzzing. Instead of men in black suits from different government branches, we have dead cops that have a different look to those of us that are alive. Instead of aliens, it’s Deado’s or essentially dead people that didn’t move on to the afterlife and not rot into monsters.

The story isn’t terrible and they actually fix some problems that I had with the comic book, but it suffers from what all comic book movies suffer from as it has a terrible case of end-of-the-world-itis. While the ending of the comic book wasn’t amaze-balls, it also wasn’t so over the top that you didn’t care or believe that anything would actually change. The gist is that the “Deado’s” are putting together the Staff of Jericho. If put together is reverses the flow of the giant fan that sucks up dead souls for judgement. Go ahead and soak that in for a moment… giant fan… convenient item that for some reason reverses the fan… living dead inherit the earth… giant fan?

Another big difference from the comic book is Nick’s (played by Reynolds) relationship with his wife. In the comic he was always working so really there wasn’t much attachment and he seemed more concerned with finding out why he was dead then say checking in on his family. Also in the comic he doesn’t show up the day after he’s died if I remember correctly, but two years after. His wife has already moved on and really you don’t give a shit about either of them. In the film version Nick is up and running by the time of his funeral and so neither he nor the wife have moved on. In his new form of an old Asian man (played by the legendary James Hong) he continues to try and contact her. Though this was 100% by the book it still strangely works because actress Stephanie Szostak is a very convincing widow. Aside from Bridges, Szostak is the best part of the film. Reynolds is no slouch to the romantic lead either so they share a good chemistry though you’ll be left wondering why the movie is spending so much time on it when it’s all convenient to the plot and nothing more. In that way it’s like two genres fighting for screen time and neither one wins.

The once great Kevin Bacon is also in the film. If you haven’t figured it out just from me telling you he’s in the movie and not the lead then I will spell out the fact that he’s the bad guy for you. Literally the minute he talks and interacts with Reynolds it’s painfully obvious that he’s a dirty cop… and then they spend the rest of the movie hitting you over the head with the fact. Bacon is Bacon. He’s reached that point in his career where he’s basically playing himself (or at least the film version of himself) and while he gives a good performance it’s really nothing to get excited for.

Actually those last seven words sum up the entire movie, “it’s really nothing to get excited for.” It didn’t bore me and overall it wasn’t that terrible, but it wasn’t exciting either. In terms of the story its average, the acting maybe even above average and the graphics are definitely average for the age we live in. I didn’t stop watching it like I thought I would, but I could have also screwed around on my phone while watching it and not feel as if I was missing out on anything important. Sadly the next chapter of this universe will never reach the big screen due to how terribly this film performed at the box office and it’s a shame because it would have limited Reynolds to a cameo and prevented Bridges from being Cogburn the entire movie. Oh well, that’s why I like comic books because even an average comic can get a sequel.

Score: 3/5

Director: Robert Schwentke Writers: Phil Hay & Matt Manfredi Based on the Comic by: Peter M. Lenkov Studio: Universal

Group Review: Thor - The Dark World

A group review for something other than a comic! No way, but yes way. Not all of us could see Thor 2 over the weekend, but those of us that did are here to present their thoughts on the film. There are some spoilers in the last few reviews, but I guarantee that the first is spoiler free so you can read that before running away holding your ears. Here's what the film is about in case you couldn't piece that together already:

Faced with an enemy that even Odin and Asgard cannot withstand, Thor must embark on his most perilous and personal journey yet, one that will reunite him with Jane Foster and force him to sacrifice everything to save us all.

Carl:

I walked into Thor, The Dark World excited for the continuation of the Marvel Universe on-screen.  After the movie ended, I felt let down.  With a safe plot in which none of the major characters fear death, an undeveloped villain, and an anti-climactic ending, the movie added nothing to the mythos of the character or the Marvel Universe plotline.

Outstanding actors flounder with no solvent story to act to, and the only thing going for the film is the outstanding effects.  A little kid in the theater kept oohing and aahhing at the events of the film.  He was entertained, but anyone slightly older than him will find this movie forgettable.

Samantha:

Let us first start off with the good. You really can’t go wrong with Chris Hemsworth, especially when he takes his shirt off. The cast of him as Thor is perfection at its core. Then you have Natalie Portman in which you wish she would take her shirt off. The two on-screen have some great chemistry. But ok let me get back to the superhero stuff. The action is packed in with this installment. The battling scenes are fun and visually amazing (btw did not see it in 3D). You would think there is only two ways to use a hammer, going down and across, but this movie proves that Mjolnir is as badass as Thor.

I thought shoving Loki’s appearances would become quite obvious in the movie, but I thought it was played nicely. I was pleased with his performance, and the heartfelt brotherhood between him and Thor was probably my favorite part.

The negatives. Where the hell was Sif? She gets a movie poster, but we barely see her. The previews were misleading thinking that she gets in the way of Thor and Jane. Even so, she wasn’t in the movie all that much. It was disappointing and a total cop-out in my opinion.

Also, when the first Thor was made I feel like there was no pressure to please too many people. Surprisingly, Thor ended up to be a favorite Marvel movie by many. I think part of that magic came from the tiny jokes that lead to some unexpected laughs. So when the writers sat down to make this movie they tried to force that magic all over again. The jokes are so overdone, and you catch onto this five minutes into the movie. It is annoying. I still laughed some, but found myself most times frustrated.

All and all, I would still recommend the movie. It has lots of action, and also leads up to some big reveals about Thanos. It leads perfectly into another Thor or Avengers.

Steve:

Of all the so-called Phase 2 Marvel films heralding the Avengers sequel, Thor: The Dark World has been my least anticipated. Like many others, I’ve always found Thor to be a one-note beat; not ironically, a blunt object without much pathos.

Still, I went into this with an open mind, and I’m glad I did. As a pure popcorn movie, it scratched my action itch with a pretty sound hammering. Saying that, the fight scenes were marred by an ill-defined nefarious plan that didn’t really inspire and some exceptionally phoned-in acting (c’mon, Hopkins). Chris Hemsworth is still pretty damn hammy; but then again, I guess the role calls for it, so I’m gonna give him some leeway.

Tom Hiddleston is the reason to watch this movie. I know: shocker, right? Sure, he’s a funny trickster with great timing, and he still plays that role to smarmy perfection, but in Thor 2, we see much more of his sorrow, guilt and, at times, reluctance, with Loki even playing the hero. Sure, he’s motivated by his own selfishness - a murderer raging against a murder - but the exhaustion he shows after the tantrum he throws on learning of his “mother,” for example, is as palpable as Loki usually is smooth.

Finally, I’ve heard others complaining about the “Star Wars-ing” of Asgard, but I actually thought the Golden Realm was well done, and enjoyed seeing its viking-tech approach, particularly when set against the incursion of dark elf-tech (since we’re just making shit up now). The elf soldier masks especially were pretty dope. Altogether, it brought home the idea that these are actually advanced alien/inter-dimensional societies seen as gods and fairytales: an outlook I’ve always preferred in this Marvel mythos.

Altogether, with a mid-credits scene that gave me throbbing nerd wood - not necessarily because of Benicio del Toro’s Collector, but rather what he was “collecting” - I’d give this a solid ... Thor-out-of-five (I’m so sorry) and thought it was a fun, if mediocre distraction.

Jordan:

Is Thor: The Dark World a plot driven masterpiece? Will it compete with the likes of 12 Days a Slave or Gravity at next year`s Oscars, vying for a spot among those films that attempt to leave you shaking in your seat or thinking big, new thoughts? Absolutely not. Will it have you at the edge of your chair with a “holy shit this is awesome” gaping mouth for the duration of its 120 minutes? You bet your sweet ass it will.

Thor TDW is no Oscar bait by any means, but the amount of sheer imagination and spectacle here was enough to make it one of my most enjoyable theater going experiences this year so far. Sure it’ll get knocked for not having a complex enough plot, even though the story functions on the scale of a myth and I never thought it needed any more explanation than it did, this way it felt like you were seeing a tale from Olympia or something play out on screen. But so much works, Eccelston kills it as the dark elf Malekith whose mystery and darkness makes him formidable every time hes on screen. Hemsworth again personifies the thunder god Thor onscreen as you’ve always wanted to see him portrayed and Tom Hiddleston`s Loki? Well, he’s Tom Middleson’s Loki. Enough said.

What really got me though was just how damn awesome the creative team did on world and character designs. The eerie masks of the accursed dark elves, Malekith’s holy-shit-this-guy-is-evil design, the spaceships, even Asgard itself all look wonderful here. I’ve only ever seen fights like these, worlds this big and strange and enemy designs this dark and frightening play out in the inside of my head. Seeing stuff this cool, loud and gnarly looking is, for me, a step in the right direction towards the kind of epic, kick-ass fiction I’ve always wanted to see onscreen. I haven’t been this breathlessly radded-out since watching Superman battle other Kryptonians in Man of Steel this past summer. Forget all the fuss about this or that, go to this movie, enjoy the spectacle, and allow yourself and your mind to be transported back to your childhood playroom and the action figures you’d create worlds and battles with there. Whens the last time you felt that wonder and glee? As self-respecting nerds, we owe this to ourselves.

Dustin:

I saw this version of Thor 2 and it was way better... not as many ass shots as you'd expect, but still better.

Score: Hammer Time!

Director: Alan Taylor Writers: Christopher Yost, Christopher Markus, Stephen McFeely, Don Payne, Robert Rodat Production: Disney/Marvel Studios Run Time: 112 Minutes

Review: Marvel Knights – Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk

There’s something logic about the choice of making this the next Marvel Knights animation project, but at the same time something very illogical as well. Unlike the previous two entries in the Marvel Knights animation line Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk is set in a different world with a story that is connected to other events that you’ll either know or won’t. It’s also the only story to have a huge delay between issues when originally published. While I know that the rest of the series sold quite well when it did return, I did not partake in it. I have a policy that any book that’s published by a corporation that has huge delays are not something that I spend money on. With that said I was curious to see how the story turned out without supporting a late book. I’m going to talk about the story briefly, but any criticism really belongs to the comic and not the animation since it’s just an adaptation of the original material. The first two chapters/issues are great. To be frank they’re why everyone bought the comic to begin with and you can’t deny the quality. It’s just everything after it that becomes a mess of story and to be honest felt slapped together. Not only where there far too many pop culture references that were no longer relevant, but Lindelof manages to make a mess of everything Hulk related at the drop of a hat. The story captures none of the charm of the Ultimate line and instead delivers a stereotypical berserker Wolverine and a comical Hulk.

The overall production on the animation was actually very good and seems to improve with each animation. Yu’s artwork may not have been the best choice for an animation, but the Marvel Knights team makes it work. Yu is notorious for mis-proportions in comics and while that stylization works for the printed page, it doesn’t for animation. Overall though I would say that the animation was successful and especially when you consider how stylized the source material was. I can only imagine how much work must have gone into the production.

There were a couple of things that about the voice acting and narration that didn’t work out. Any caption box that gave a time direction, such as “six months ago” was terribly out-of-place. It could have just been the fact that there was no other sound to accompany the voice over, but even then I think it would have just sounded off. Really the caption from the comic should have been dropped and a newly animated caption blasted across the screen with no voice over. That’s a device that works in the comics, but did not translate to the screen in any way shape or form.

Then there’s the voice acting in general… it was unfortunately not great this time around. It’s not bad and by no means does it stop the product from being good or enjoyable, but it struggles at times. Jen Walters in particular struggled. I couldn’t tell if her character was supposed to be snarky or funny because the character came off annoying due to the voice acting. Also Hulk, true Hulk, was over the top. I can’t even think of a comparison. I wouldn’t say that it was Christian Bale Batman bad, but it was definitely in the same ballpark. It was like Grimlock and another Hulk had a baby and this was that baby. Really after the first encounter with each character you stop noticing it, but the point is that you do notice it.

I wouldn’t say that this Marvel Knight’s animation was as strong at the last two they produced in terms of story and voice acting, but there’s a definite improvement in the quality of the animation. I think it boils down to this story not being the best pick, but if like me you never finished reading it then there is some solid entertainment value to be had. I’m digging this franchise so I’ll be looking forward to what they do next, but in the meantime this was a solid effort at providing some entertainment.

Score: 3/5

Writer: Damon Lindelof Artist: Leinil Francis Yu, Dave McCaig Publisher: Marvel Knights and Shout Factory Price: $14.97 Release Date: 9/10/13

Review: Justice League – The Flashpoint Paradox

It was a sad day when it was announced the Warner Brother’s Premiere line of animation was coming to a close, but as time moved forward it became obvious that they were simply changing and rebranding it to better match the new face of the DC Universe. That said Flashpoint was the perfect story to choose as the end cap to the line of animation considering it also ushered the closing of the DCU and brought about the company wide reboot that’s become known as the New 52. The story is a familiar one to any comic fan; something happened in the Flash’s past that changed the future and he awakes one day to find an Elseworld’s inspired world. There is no Justice League and the heroes that once made up the team are scattered and different. Aquaman and Wonder Woman are at war and their battle is threatening to destroy the entire planet. Batman is not who he seems to be and Superman was never known to the world. In fact the world’s greatest hero is Cyborg who up until the reboot was a glorified parental unit for the Teen Titans. Now he’s trying to launch an attack against the Altantians and Amazonians before it’s too late.

Upon discovering that the world has changed, Barry Allen finds that one of those changes in this bleak world is the fact that his mother is alive. With everything the way it is he knows he must do something before his memories of how the world should be faded away. Having no connection to the speed force he finds himself driving to Wayne Manor to find Batman. The problem is it’s not his Batman. In this reality Bruce Wayne was the one that was shot and Thomas Wayne lived to become the Batman while his wife became the Joker. Barry talks Thomas into believing him, but first he needs his help in recreating the accident that connected him to the speed force.

As far as the story goes it was very strong. There were still quite a few changes to the story from the comic which became the norm with anything adapted that didn’t stand on its own like Superman All-Star. There weren’t nearly as many as there were with Superman: Unbound and the changes that were made didn’t hinder the story as much. The pacing was strong and really the only part the story stumbled is when it took the time to explain the back story for Batman, Aquaman and Wonder Woman. For Batman we really didn’t need to see the scene in which Bruce died since it was already mentioned so many times before. Really it just felt like it was too cool to drop, but it ended up feeling out-of-place because of that.

With Aquaman and Wonder Woman’s story it was changed from a complex political metaphor to Mera’s death at Wonder Woman’s hands. This part actually made no sense since WW and AM were supposed to marry and unite the people, but Aquaman calls Mera his queen several times. Mera tries to kill WW and ends up dead and this creates the war. I don’t think they really fleshed out this part and what they left was very jumbled. Granted no one is going to give a damn in the long run, but I’m sure others noticed as well which just doesn’t show the care with the script that has previously been associated with the animation line. For me the biggest detail overlooked was the fact that Reverse Flash had all of the same memories as Barry which would be impossible with Barry being the key to the change and not Reverse Flash.

The animation had a decent look. Everyone has the same frame which is to say thin torso, broad shoulders and a long face. It works for a few of the characters, but both versions of Superman looked strange and Bruce Wayne Batman was also off looking. Thomas Wayne Batman looked pretty bad ass and though I wanted him to make more sounds of gruffness like he did in the comic, it was still pretty good.

The voice acting was decent, but there were parts where it felt like they wanted to minimize the cast’s speaking roles. Barry and Thomas have the most dialogue and it was definitely for the better as they delivered the best performance. Nathan Fillion reprises his role of Hal Jordan, but its short-lived due to the story. Aquaman’s voice was the most out-of-place due to the fact that the tone and delivery never matched the expression on the character’s face.

In general it was a good movie and it was fun to watch, which is the important thing after all. With a lot of the Premiere line of animations I’ve found the adaptation to be so spot on that it becomes dull to watch them if you’ve already read the series in comic form. I like where this leaves the animation and now DC is in a great spot to adapt stories from the New 52 and having an easier time adapting them. Since there is a cohesive continuity now several animated movies can be released that tie-in to each other and give a different animated experience or they can continue to cherry pick the big stories.

Score: 3/5

Director: Jay Oliva

Writer: Jim Krieg

Produced by: WB Premiere Animation

Price: $24.99 on Blu-Ray

Release Date: 7/30/13