Review: Juice Squeezers #1 (of 4)

David Lapham’s Juice Squeezers made an incredible debut in Dark Horse Comics Presents. It was the first time in a while that Lapham had written and drawn a story of his own and what a world he created. The basket weaving club is actually a gang of “Squeezers” aka scrawny kids that crawl underground to kill giant bugs. That’s right, giant bugs. Leave it to Lapham to create a world that is strange and yet grounded in reality. This issue begins with our squeezers pulling an all-nighter against some giant dung beetles. The kids emerge by the school dumpsters. What Lapham captures perfectly is how children act. The leader of the group Eric has a crush on the only girl in the group, Lizzy; he’s obviously awkward around her since he attempts to ask her out at the worst possible times. As she’s exiting the small vent hole he begins asking her only to be interrupted by Marko the team goof. Their club administrator Mr. Kettleborne finds them and tells them to clear out before the principle spots them, but not before he informs them that someone has purchased Valley May Farms. Everyone but Lizzy lets out a troubling “Ohhh.” She asks what’s up with the farm and we learn later that the farm is a hot spot for the bugs and the site of a huge bug/human battle.

At first glance you might think that this is Goonies meets Starship Troopers and maybe it’s a little bit of that. For me it’s just something new. At times it was like Aliens only with children. Other times it was like an episode of the Twilight Zone. There’s no one vibe that I get from it, but there is freshness to it.

Juice Squeezers #1 Cover (1)

Lapham creates an incredibly realistic world. It seems ridiculous at times like when Mr. Kettleborne explains the battle in which he lost his eye; it’s almost as if you’re waiting for this to be the delusions of one man, but it’s not. Even the explanation of why the farm was suddenly sold was realistic and believable. Lapham does some incredible world building with this story.

Though the “Squeezers” are a team, this is not a team book per say. Lizzy is the main character; from there it’s like a pyramid of support characters. No one is unimportant, but they all play their roles. Marko was perhaps my favorite character due to the fact that he’s an asshole. I don’t know if he also has a crush on Lizzy, but he’s a disruptive dickhead every chance he gets. At one point he says he’s so tired he’s seeing giant squirrels and really I just wanted them to leave him for dead though he was alive and kicking. Just because I hate him doesn’t mean he’s not my favorite. All of the characters are very realistic and may even remind you of people you know or knew.

I’m a huge fan of Lapham’s artwork. I enjoy his style and it’s great to see him return to illustrating. Seeing his work colored is also a treat and Lee Loughridge does a great job making the colors pop. The small town setting is perfect for the art as it doesn’t require Lapham to spend a ton of time filling the pages with extra buildings and details. It gives the story a seclusion that plot needs and again plays into that Twilight Zone feeling. Lapham’s bugs are pretty damn awesome. They’re not creepy, at least not to me, but they are rather cool to look at. The one page splash of the Dung beetle was very cool and again had a TV show vibe to it.

I really enjoyed this issue. The world that Lapham has created is very strange, but interesting. I can’t get enough of the characters and really the secrets that the town holds. I think Lizzy is going to bust that open and we might find out that the world we know is a bit different… well different and filled with giant fucking bugs.

If you’re a Lapham fan this issue and series are a no-brainer to pick up, but if you’ve never had the chance to read his work this is a great place to start. I had high hopes for this series after its DHP premiere and this first issue didn’t disappoint. Pick it up!

Score: 4/5

Writer/Artist/Creator: David Lapham Colorist: Lee Loughridge Publisher: Dark Horse Comics Price: $3.99 Release Date: 12/31/13

Review: The Occultist #4 (of 5)

This issue had me sweating! When I posted the preview yesterday I had to do my best not to look at the pages for The Occultist because I wanted to read it in one sitting. Damn was this a good issue. I don’t read comics on the edge of my seat, but if I did, this would be one of those issues for sure. If you’ve been reading The Occultist then you’ve know that Rob was being duped for a while, but it’s not until this issue that we learn what the “play” against him is exactly. At the end of the last issue the Restless Dead found the spirit of the man who gave Rob the sword, Mr. Elder, and told him that Rob was about to break the pact. The sword apparently has a pact that keeps the jealous dead behind a gate that prevents them from raining hell upon the earth. The Restless dead are okay because they don’t want to harm the living, that’s cool right? Mr. Elder helps Anna relax so that she can venture into the spirit world and we learn a little about the man she visited in the hospital. Meanwhile Rob is unaware of how much he’s flaunting his life in front of the jealous dead and the gate… well it begins to crack. What’s worse is that the sword is beginning to reject Rob which was James Charles’ plan all along.

I’m telling you this issue is intense and the ending was rewarding. There’s still one issue left, but I have a feeling it’s going to set the world up for the next mini-series. What I like about this issue and the potential for the next is that the cat is out of the bag. There’s going to be a lot of consequences for Rob and the events of this story will once again wreak havoc on his life. In a lot of ways he’s the magic Peter Parker since he has all this power, but nothing he does betters his life and when he thinks it is… well, it gets ruined quickly.

The Occultist #4 CoverTim Seeley does a fantastic job of finally revealing a big chunk of the story as a lot of plotlines come to a conclusion in this issue/series. Even if you just started reading The Occultist with this volume, you should still get a lot of satisfaction out of this issue. If you’ve been following the series throughout its existence than get ready for some huge payoff that connects so many elements that it’s well worth the read. Rob’s character development in this issue alone is great, but even better considering the growth over the series.

Mike Norton brings his fantastic abilities to the issue. His ghostly images of the characters still hold so much personality that you’ll be able to read every emotion on their bluish faces. Norton and Seeley’s experience collaborating on Revival really shines through here as they complement each other well, yet again. Norton in particular has brought life to this world with his vivid expressions and detailed body language for the characters. I don’t know if this series would have been quite as successful without his artistic abilities.

I really want to drone on and one about this issue. It’s the best issue of the series and really left me with a ton of excitement. I’ll be sad to read the last issue next month, but at the same time I’ve never been more excited to read the conclusion. This was the story that the series needed and hopefully the next mini-series isn’t too far behind. If this was the only volume you’ve read then I would definitely recommend buying the other issues on Dark Horse’s digital store just to see how great the build has been to this issue. Damn, this issue was good!

Score: 5/5

Writer: Tim Seeley Artist: Mike Norton Publisher: Dark Horse Comics Price: $3.50 Release Date: 12/31/13

Review: Deadworld: Restoration #2

I enjoyed the first issue of Deadworld: Restoration so much that I ended up trying to familiarize myself with Deadworld’s history by getting the omnibus and the trade of the last miniseries, War of the Dead.  That helped in making a little more sense of this story; now knowing a bit of the back story also made me realize that Gary Reed has done a great job of somehow making the whole Deadworld story going while still making it easy for first-time readers to jump on this story arc. Again, there’s a ton going on in this story so I’ll try to recap some of the main parts without boring anyone who’s reading this.  It starts out with King Zombie looking out into a field of zombies while a siren goes off to attract them to an open field.  We find out that the teenagers killing the zombies at the end of the first issue are called the Marauders, and they’re on another one of their killing sprees here.  They’re paid for killing zombies and bringing their boss the zombies’ heads.  Who exactly is paying them is unknown by King Zombie, but we do figure it out in this issue… and who it is definitely surprised me.  King Zombie also has three Grakken with him, who are ready to feast on flesh.  Now, the Grakken are hybrids of human and those not of this world or the ‘other’ world.  Previously, King Zombie sacrificed a man in a fire, and out of the fire shot an energy presence that consumed three women that Zombie had taken hostage back in Requiem for the World.  He still uses them as his weapons, and they brutally feast on zombies that the Marauders are trying to kill, and they kill some Marauders in the process.

Also, if I understand correctly, the whole reason King Zombie went after our human protagonists in the first place is mainly because of a man named Deake.  Deake was Justin Lansbury’s apprentice.  Lansbury collected tomes or ‘casting books’ as he called them, and he claimed he found the book.  When he tried to perform a ritual from it he was killed, and now Deake has the book.  King Zombie is now after that book, as he claims it speaks to him, it says everything.

DWResto02-coverWe meet a new character who calls himself Beelzebub and has a very interesting outlook on naturally getting rid of zombies.  He says that larvae will only eat dead flesh, or the flesh of zombies.  They befriend Beelzebub and he joins Deake and Daniel, so it should be interesting to see how his plan plays out.

Again, I ended up talking more about this issue than planned but still left a bunch out.  Gary Reed’s writing is great; I especially enjoyed the crazy tie-ins between different groups of characters towards the end that will definitely bring some more conflict to this already hectic story.  On the other hand, it can prove to be a little daunting to read this book, as it will most likely take two reads to make sense of everything.  Personally that doesn’t matter to me, but I’m sure some people could be put off by this.  I do have to say that there are some characters that aren’t quite as memorable as others, and there were a lot of names being thrown around.  The problem for me was that although I love the art, sometimes it’s hard to distinguish who is who sometimes.

Sami Makkonen’s art fits the story perfectly.  As I said before I’ve been trying to catch up on the newer Deadworld installments, and the series itself has had a lot of artists.  Makkonen had previously done not only War of the Dead but also Slaughterhouse.  Now, Slaughterhouse was in black and white and looking over it I’m not too crazy about it since his style has tones of dark and shading.  However, in color, his art may be my favorite out of anyone I’ve seen leave their mark on this series (and that’s saying a lot considering Vince Locke did a lot of work on this series in the past, any fellow Cannibal Corpse fans out there?).  I like to think of his artwork as a form of controlled chaos, which plays into this tale of survival very well.

All in all, I honestly don’t think that there’s any other book that deserves $3.99 as much as this one does.  This is thinking man’s horror done right.

Score: 4/5

Writer: Gary Reed Artist: Sami Makkonen Publisher: IDW Publishing Price: $3.99 Release Date: 12/31/13

Review: Sinister Dexter #2

The worst thing about this issue is that the story is a two-parter. In all likelihood it was actually a four parter or more, but due to the collected nature of IDW’s issues it ended up in two parts. This series won me over in a big way with the first issue which made me curious to see if the second issue would continue the magic or let me down. The story actually begins without our two main characters present. A manga looking school girl has shown up in the middle of a science lab and scares the shit out of the scientist working there. One of them approaches asking the age old question of “where are your mummy and daddy” and gets a finger blade in the eye!

The little girl, Polly, begins slaughtering everyone in the room as she transforms her entire arm into a blade. Think T-1000 style and there you’ll have it. One scientist makes it out alive only to run into Polly’s partner, a woman dressed like a ninja. It’s clear that these two are assassins/gun-sharks as well and they’ve been sent to stop the lab from curing Cancer… fuckers.

Their paths are about to cross Sinister and Dexter’s as they fly into the city known as Mangapore… yes, Mangapore. Kind of like Madripoor but “manga” instead. It’s a great node to manga in general with the name and Polly’s design. At any rate, Sinister and Dexter land and are questioned by Customs before entering the city which is a metal island grounded into the ocean; they admit to being Gun-Sharks, but tell Customs they’re there for vacation and nothing more. They’re very straightforward which is an instant clue that something is up with their trip, but that element doesn’t play out in this issue. They catch a taxi and when asked what language, Sinister selects Low-Lode which basically means the driver swears at them. It’s quite humorous as he later complains about it.

SinisterDexter02-cvrAThis issue was different from the first, but it was still really good. There’s this incredible sense of history with this world. A bit of that is revealed within the story, but the great thing is that it really makes it feel as if there’s more to discover and that the world is moving without us. It’s like a video game that’s always online, just because you’re not a part of it at the moment doesn’t mean something’s not happening. That’s a hard thing to create as writer, but Dan Abnett manages it quite well.

Again, my one and only gripe is that I couldn’t finish the story. I really wanted to keep reading because that’s what this series does to you, makes you want more. Abnett does a fantastic job of making this world funny, exciting, serious and deadly all at once. I’m glad that this chunk of story has an overall plot, but the world and characters are so interesting that I think I would be entertained just following their Tuesday routine. If you didn’t like how much dialogue there was in the first issue then you’ll probably enjoy the fact that there is less in this issue. I was actually bummed by this because I really liked Sinister and Dexter’s banter.

There are two artists on this issue, but Andy Clarke returns for the first half of the story. His art is fantastic and really brings the world to life. I don’t know if I would have enjoyed the first issue as much if he wasn’t illustrating it. Dylan Teague joins him for the second half of the story and overall his line work is very good. His artwork dips in the places that Clarke’s excels in which is mainly the backgrounds and sheer amount of detail on the page.

Clarke can make a conversation interesting just by making the background world look alive and interesting, whereas Teague’s backgrounds are vacant or solid colors. I also didn’t particularly care for Teague’s version of Polly and her ninja partner, but it was probably just due to the fact that I had already seen Clarke’s version first. Even with these minor complaints the artwork looks great and is wonderfully colored by Chris Blythe. Blythe does a fantastic job of uniting the two art styles and gives the book a consistent look and feel.

Sinister Dexter isn’t everyone’s choice of soda, but if you didn’t like the first issue I think you might want to give it another shot. This issue vibes different, but still manages to capture the entertaining and futurist world of the first issue. There isn’t as much violence and gun play in this issue, but it fills that void with other elements that are just as exciting.

I was pleased with this issue and glad that it didn’t suffer from the second issue let-down that so many other series suffer from. To be honest when I hear reprint or “first time released in North America” I get nervous because usually it’s just an easy way to fill a spot on a publisher’s schedule, but I’m actually glad that IDW picked up Sinister Dexter and how they’ve handled it so far. Though I could really go for an advanced look at the next issue…

Score: 4/5

Writer: Dan Abnett Artists: Andy Clarke & Dylan Teague Publisher: 2000 AD/IDW Publishing Price: $3.99 Release Date: 12/31/13

Review: Baltimore: Chapel of Bones #1 (of 2)

The Baltimore series is an engrossing set of comics dealing with a supernatural hunter in post-World War I Europe.  Mignola and Golden scripts have been atmospheric, action packed, and fun.  Baltimore had some mystery about him, his opponents had been impressive, and his time period is so under-utilized. Although this series should be ongoing, Baltimore still comes sporadically in chapters.  Now, Baltimore reaches London to hunt the Vampire that wrecked the title character’s life.

Unfortunately, the confrontation comes in the last page.  Where this could have been a two-issue fight, the real fisticuffs won’t come until issue two.  Yes, there’s a whole comic of flashback and explication of Baltimore’s origin.  And, yes, it’s still a good comic.  Unfortunately, the good fight scenes and eerie atmosphere are sparse.

Baltimore Chapel of Bones #1 Cover

Score: 3/5

Writer: Mike Mignola and Christopher Golden Artist: Ben Stenbeck Publisher: Dark Horse Comics Price: $3.50 Release Date: 12/31/13

This Is A Legit Lady Death Cosplay

In the 90's my only exposure to Lady Death was through Wizard magazine (RIP). I loved the characters design and the fact that she carried a big ass sword and basically looked hot and kicked ass. By the time I was able to check out the character Chaos! Comics had one solid foot in the grave and was producing issues that were basically just pinups with words. When the character was rebooted under Avatar Press' Boundless line I was excited to once again check out Lady Death only to find a muddled storyline trying to ride the coat tails of DC's Wonder Woman (pant wearing WW) at the time. I rode it out on the series for as long as I could, but stopped forcing myself to read something I clearly didn't enjoy. That said, I still have a soft spot for Lady Death; even if it's just for her character design. Thank you to cosplayer Toni for nailing the character! lady-death-cosplay-2

lady-death-cosplay-3

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Trailer Time: Santa Company... Yes That Is A Christmas Anime!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sFmOgIZxXyc I'm one of those annoying people who love Christmas 24/7, 365 days a year; so this anime about Christmas... right up my alley! It's a clever idea that breaks the North Pole into three groups: the Santa dept., gift dept. and the Reindeer dept. The gist is that one kid isn't getting their present because their letter was late and the newest recruit Noel (basically an Elf) takes it upon herself to make sure the kid gets their toy. No word on the release, but I'm hoping I won't have to wait until Christmas.

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Like Classic 2-D Animation? Then You're Going To Love Playing Cuphead

That image above is a video game not a cartoon, but basically in Cuphead from Studio MDHR you'll be playing as a cartoon character. MDHR described the game like this:

Cuphead is a classic run and gun that centers around 1-on-1 fights (2-on-1 in two player mode). With Cuphead, we aim to evolve the genre by adding new features such as: super arts, infinite lives, a playable world map and hidden secrets. In addition to that, we will have refined controls, additional boss patterns on harder modes and balanced weapons to equip (that you don’t lose!). We plan to release 10-15 bosses per episode and end up with over 30 bosses. If all goes as planned, we will defeat the current “Guinness World Record for Most Boss Battles in a Run and Gun Game”[25 total].

I want to play it just based on the animated look, but here's a video of it in action.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v80_FwbAv_s

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Trailer Time: Bo, Plushy Gangsta

It looks like Danger Zone's digital first series is making it's way to print. You can actually my review for the first issue here on the site. Official Press Release:

ACTION LAB DANGER ZONE's Newest cutting edge series is about to be unleashed with the release of BO, PLUSHY GANSTA! Created by video game designer, Pavel Balabanov, BO is a hyper violent, over the top, urban fantasy! We have a specially created trailer to promote the launch of the series! The video features an original Bo, Plushy Gansta theme by hip hop artist, PHACE.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFsD2Cx8ZyI

BO, PLUSHY GANSTA #1 (of 4) Writer(s): Pavel Balabanov, Vasily Terentiev Artist Name(s): Pavel Balabanov ** Cover Artist(s): Pavel Balabanov

Are the legends of Bo, the “teddy bear” gangsta, true?  And, did we just say teddy bear gangsta?! You’re about to find out--when Bo’s girls get nabbed by a rival gang boss, the mysterious and fearsome plushy gangsta is forced into action!  It’s Scarface meets Ted in this over-the-top video game style urban epic.  Also ships with a variant cover by Balabadov! Bo features an amazing superstar artist in the making, in this first comic work from a Russian video game artist, Pavel Balabanov! From Russia with thug!! FC/ 28 pgs./2.99 US        On sale Jan. 16th

2013 Comic Book Round-Up: The Worst – Part 3

Welcome to Comic Bastards' yearly "Worst of" list. That’s right, “Worst”! We don’t just tell you what the “Best” of the year is we remind you of everything you’d like to forget. We have so many contributors on the site now that we actually had to break the list up into parts this year. This is part one which will cover "Worst Movie/TV or Video Game Comic Adaptation", "Worst Comic Related Property Outside of Comic Books" "Worst Thing That 2013 Will Be Remember For?" and "What Are You Not Looking Forward to From 2014?" with amazing belts created by our very own Steve Paugh! You can find Part 1 and Part 2 by clicking on the previous links. Also be sure to check out this week's podcast to hear Kevin and Dustin read and have fun with everyone's worst of list! Thanks for reading and if you’d like to check out the “Best of” list then you can do so here: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and Part 4.

Worst Movie/TV or Video Game Comic Adaptation

7 - Worst Movie TV or Video Game Comic Adaptation

Dustin - Batman '66 (DC Comics)

I know that everyone and their mother loved the shit out of this series, but I didn’t. I don’t like the TV show. I look at it as an embarrassment to Batman and think that when I premiered someone should have lost their job rather than making a second episode. Then they made a comic book that captures the campy “fun” of the show… yeah fuck that noise.

Kevin - G.I. Joe (IDW Publishing)

IDW has come back to this well that is my childhood and have taken a shit down it. This incarnation of the Joes it is the embodiment of convenient writing that insults more than it entertains. This breaks my heart.

James - G.I Joe (IDW Publishing)

I'm just down on it. It isn't good. Way to cheesy for my liking and I usually like cheese (I'm a provolone guy).

Samantha – G.I. Joe (IDW Publishing)

G.I. Joe fans took a hit right in the gut when someone decided to make shitty products for loyal fans.

Jeff - Robocop: Last Stand (Boom Studios)

My comic bane of this year, symbolic of what is wrong with the sub-“Big Two” comic publishers. Take Frank Miller's outdated and sexist script for the worst Robocop film, barely edit it to fit into 20 page chunks that end in the middle of film scenes, and then have it muddily illustrated by the bottom rung of IDW's art team. Robocop may not be a fresh property but it deserves a hell of a lot better.

Steve - Robocop: Last Stand (Boom Studios)

This went from bad, to worse, to fucking awful.

Adam - Robocop: Last Stand (Boom Studios)

What Steve and Jeff said.

Jordan - Robocop: Last Stand (Boom Studios)

Miller deserves better than this.

Worst Comic Related Property Outside of Comic Books

8 - Worst Comic Related Thing Outside of Comic Books

Kevin - The Under Armor DC/Marvel Hook Up (Marvel/DC)

Please pay $59 for this compression long sleeve with the Bat logo on it.

Carl - Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC and Marvel)   

I've seen pap smears with more gripping plot twists.

Samantha - Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC and Marvel)

Sounds great in theory, but Justin put it well stating that the Marvel name is what carries this show.

Jordan - Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC and Marvel)

This show is pretty poop. Which is sad cuz I want it to be better. Want a real comic book TV show? Watch the latest few episodes of Season 2 of Arrow, which I think has broken out of the CW mold and become the comic TV series to beat.

James - Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC and Marvel)

Marvel has been on a roll with movies that I think might have made them cocky enough to go for prime time TV. Nothing wrong with that in itself, but what they have here is a high budget, watered down version of something that could have been a good thing that is losing viewers weekly. Movies still rock though, mostly...kind of...better than DC movies anyway.

Erik - Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC and Marvel)

I already have a hard time sitting through primetime television dramas anyway, but this really stinks. Poor acting mixed with half-assed action sequences don’t usually grab my attention. I’m not going to keep watching it because it has Joss Whedon’s name attached to it.

Jeff - Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC and Marvel)

While 2013 had its fair share of groaner movies, none of them were so directly disappointing. Prepackaged and glossy, even for TV standards, it'd be cancelled already if it weren't for the tenuous connection to the Marvel U, tepid and sometimes barely memorable enough to be frustrating. I wish I had watched Agents of S.M.A.S.H or R.I.P.D. so I could pick anything other than a Whedon show for the worst of the year but that's the breaks.

Adam - The Walking Dead (AMC)

I totally gave up this season on watching it.  Past the first half of season three it's been moving at a snail's pace, and I feel like the characters in the show aren't even close to holding a candle to their comic book counterparts.  Andrea is one of my favorite characters in the book, and in the show I couldn't wait for her to die.  The governor wasn't menacing at all and I hate the changes they make for the show.  It screws with the 117 issues worth of comic book knowledge of the series in my head.

Steve – Arrow (CW)

I still don't know why anyone above the age of 14 would watch this cheesy, kitschy, tweeny show about a "superhero" who sucks anyway. It's the Twilight of superheroes.

Dustin – Man of Steel (WB)

If you listened to the podcast version of this list then you know that I originally went with Iron Man 3  and while it deserves to be on this list it didn’t quite make it. The thing is… I watched the Man of Steel for a second time this past weekend and it was unbearable. Seeing it again was painful and while I’m sure I’d feel similar pain while watching Iron Man 3, I don’t know if it can top the most un-Superman movie I’ve ever watched. I’d rather watch Superman 4 on an endless loop then to poison my eyes with this shit again.

Worst Thing That 2013 Will Be Remember For?

9 - Worst Thing 2013 Will Be Remembered For

Erik - Baby Covers

Those things are burned into my brain. The events were obviously a big deal, but people will continue to think back to those covers.

Kevin - That time Brian Wood Hit on me at a Convention            

Dude I know my hair was a little long and my shirt was a little fitted. But damn, damn man, go easy.

James - DC Moving to L.A.          

It just doesn't seem right, like a reaction to deeper issues that are indeed out there. But the move just looks bad. We will see how bad in the coming future.

Steve - DC's Rampant Creative Problems

It feels like 2013 really showed how badly DC is being run creatively, with a huge backlash from employees, former brand stalwarts and fans alike.

Dustin - DC Comics’ Editorial Meltdown

"Social media just sensationalizes what's really just an everyday occurrence" that's not a direct quote but that's basically the smoke screen that DC hide behind all year. Social Media or not I'm pretty sure we can look at any other company (not just Marvel) and we'll see a far more consistent roster of creators on titles and less disgruntled employees. It basically got to the point that you just wanted to say "enough's enough DC, clean house and start again but this time start with your EIC." Also you know shits bad when the big boss asks you to move across country so he can keep an eye on you.

Jordan - They Told us There Would be a Batman/Superman Film + Batfleck

Nuff said.

Carl - Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC/Marvel)

That show had such promise and ended up sucking so bad.  I only made it through one and a half episodes before I bailed.

Samantha - Marvel Movie Announcements (Marvel/Disney)

Pretty much whether we care about the hero or not, every Marvel character will eventually have a movie.

Adam - People Getting Offended Over the Harley Quinn Suicide            

Personally, I thought it was a cool idea.  Gave me some ideas if Pinpoint doesn't get turned into an ongoing which is a plus.

What Are You Not Looking Forward to From 2014?

10 - What Are You Not Looking Forward To From 2014

Dustin - Hype and Fake Sell Outs            

Yeah believe or not when I talk about a book on this site I want it to be good, but when it's hyped beyond belief it sucks. No publisher was innocent of it this year. That and all the "It sold out" crap. No it didn't. Not really and it doesn't matter because you'll print more or I can just buy it digitally. No one cares about that other than the publishers and eBay tricksters.

Kevin - More Comic Book TV Shows

No we're good. Television is the devil.

Carl - Eventual IDW Continuity Problems

Godzilla: Rulers of the Earth is finally getting it right.  That means IDW will revamp it for sure.  Sigh.

Steve - More DC Screw-Ups

Because you KNOW it's gonna happen...

Samantha - New Ninja Turtles Movie

Why mess with an already great movie?

Jordan - Still Being Too Broke to Afford Comic Books     

Adam - Pinpoint

If Big Dog Inc. doesn't turn this into an ongoing, I may have to kill myself. (SARCASM)

James - The Big Two "Events"   

There doesn't have to be an "Event" spanning 10 titles over 30 issues. It gets confusing and annoying after a while. Going to start waiting for the trades instead of being disappointed all the time.

Erik - Anything from DC

Do I really need a reason? I dropped every New 52 book that I read this year.

Jeff - More Comic Book Movies

Amazing Spider-Man 2, Michael Bay's TMNT, Transformers 4 (damn Bay, calm your tits, you'll get our money), 90% of Marvel and DC's output, Cartoon Network canceling more DC shows -- Keep going with our "Worst of 2013" list by checking out Part 1 and Part 2! Thanks for reading and please leave us a comment below!

2013 Comic Book Round-Up: The Worst – Part 2

Welcome to Comic Bastards' yearly "Worst of" list. That’s right, “Worst”! We don’t just tell you what the “Best” of the year is we remind you of everything you’d like to forget. We have so many contributors on the site now that we actually had to break the list up into parts this year. This is part one which will cover: "Worst Comic Event", "Worst Revival" and "Most Annoying Industry Habit of 2013" with amazing belts created by our very own Steve Paugh!  You can find Part 1 and Part 3 by clicking on the previous links. Also be sure to check out this week's podcast to hear Kevin and Dustin read and have fun with everyone's worst of list! Thanks for reading and if you’d like to check out the “Best of” list then you can do so here: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and Part 4.

Worst Comic Event

4 - Worst Comic Event

James - Forever Evil (DC Comics)

I was real stoked on this, and then I read it :(

Jeff - Forever Evil (DC Comics)

Age of Ultron sounded terrible but Forever Evil had Geoff Johns finally completely running out of gas and featured ugly and gimmicky tie-in covers that made DC enough cash that it's rumored they are considering doing something similar again soon.

Samantha - Forever Evil (DC Comics)

I tried to get into this series so hard but always felt myself forcing the reading.

Jordan - Forever Evil (DC Comics)

If the cornball name of this event wasn`t foreboding enough that you knew this thing would be crap, I don`t know what would be.

Adam - Forever Evil (DC Comics)

Most of us seem to agree on this one.

Erik - Forever Evil (DC Comics)

I'm going to have agree with Samantha on this one. I had to make myself read every word. So eventually, I just stopped reading.

Kevin - The Death of Damian Wayne (DC Comics)

It happened so early in the year and had zero impact on anything. Mostly due to the fact that the Bat books were fucked up with the jump to the New 52.

Steve - Age of Ultron (Marvel Comics)

Unnecessarily circuitous, boring and it BARELY even featured Ultron. Fine, it set up the time quake in Marvel, but that really hasn't proven to be worth it. Lame. As. Shit.

Dustin - Octo-Spidey (Marvel Comics)

Rather than go into a long-winded rant on why everything Marvel has done with this character since "One More Day" has sucked, I'm just going to say that the idea of letting the writers actually change the status quo on the book didn't need to happen with a "new" version of the character. It could have been done with PP given the correct writer and an editor willing to take the chance. Lazy storytelling wins again.

Carl - San Diego Comic Con 2013 (#SDCC)

Nothing good came from this.

Worst Revival

5 - Worst Revival

Adam - Brain Boy (Dark Horse Comics)

I don't really have a great reason for this, I just remember doing the group review for the first issue and really hating it.  I just wish I didn't have to see it come back.

Samantha - T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents (IDW Publishing)

I can't get over how unorganized this series is. It brings in some old school comics, but not the right stuff.

James - G.I. Joe (IDW Publishing)

It is hard for me to absolutely hate anything. I always try to find something good where I can, but with the Joe's, everything seems so cheesy. I just am not into it at all. My kids don't even get in to it and I showed them the old 80s cartoon with its overly acted storylines (which are kind of cool). This stuff though, no.

Dustin - G.I. Joe (IDW Publishing)

I hate to constantly bash on IDW and Dynamite for handling their licenses in a piss poor manner, but they refuse to leave my childhood in the past where it belongs, so fuck’em. I had to go with one book from one company and that’s G.I. Joe from IDW. Though I could tag on the other two books they rebooted with it as well. I wasn’t opposed to a G.I. Joe reboot, but we soon discovered that they pulled a New Ghostbusters/Marvel NOW and just put a different creative team on the book with a #1 on the issue and called it a day. This series sucked from the get go and is continuing to pull the golf ball through the hose with each issue.

Kevin – He-Man and the Masters of the Universe (DC Comics)

Since DC has owned the rights they have never really put the time and effort into this IP. With the launch of this year’s series, that trend continues.

Carl - Any Titty Book About a Fairy Tale (Mostly Zenescope)

If I have to masturbate to another Wizard of OZ adaptation where Dorothy is wearing lingerie and being spanked by flying monkeys, I'm going to be pissed.

Steve - OZ, Wonderland (Zenescope Entertainment)

They have a LOT of talent come through, but they waste it all on applying vapid cheesecake to legendary properties that deserve better.

Most Annoying Industry Habit of 2013

6 - Most Annoying Industry Habit of 2013

Carl – Pricing (3.99 and Rising!)

How could a teenager possibly collect comics when the books average $3.99 an issue?  Can't someone make comics more affordable--not just for special events?

Jordan – Pricing (3.99 and Rising!)

I agree with Carl on pricing. I'm fairly well off and in my early 20's and I can’t afford my comic book hobby.

Erik - Baby Covers (Pick a Company)

I liked it at the beginning. I thought that it was kinda cool, but I lost interest and became annoyed really fast.

Samantha – Tweeting Every Damn Picture from the Set of a Movie

Enough said.

James - Teasers to Teasers

Only 3 days till the  (Place Movie Here) trailer release....Only 2 days till the (Place Movie Here) trailer release...Redundant, and annoying after a while. I want to be hyped about the movie, not the damn trailer of the movie, enough already.

Kevin - The "Big Two" Teasing Shit

…and by shit, I mean fuck your stuff.

Dustin - Worst Teasers Ever

If it wasn't DC teasing characters you had no reason to care about it was Marvel using adjectives, verbs and nouns to hint at a fucking book. What sucked more is that smaller publishers started copying them and it sucked too. Take a page out of Dark Horse's book and make the teaser worth the time or don't bother at all. If you're going to be lazy and use only one word make it "Lazy" and call it a day.

Steve - Villain's Month / 0.1 Issues (Marvel/DC)

Barring a few exceptions, everything about VM, from the mostly lackluster stories to the gimmicky approach to the poor strategic planning was pretty terrible. And 0.1 numbering is just dumb.

Adam - Cashing in on the Zombie Craze               

Zombie War, enough said.

Jeff - The Event Book Eating Itself

Even the word 'event' no longer feels relevant as there are so many that we can actually look three events ahead just by reading ads. It's a predictable target but it was worse in 2013 than any year I can think of prior with the Big Two really going out of their way to challenge their own relevance to the industry. -- Keep going with our "Worst of 2013" list by checking out Part 1 and Part 3! Thanks for reading and please leave us a comment below!

2013 Comic Book Round-Up: The Worst – Part 1

Welcome to Comic Bastards' yearly "Worst of" list. That’s right, “Worst”! We don’t just tell you what the “Best” of the year is we remind you of everything you’d like to forget. We have so many contributors on the site now that we actually had to break the list up into parts this year. This is part one which will cover "Great Cover, But the Issue Sucked", "Worst Ongoing Series" and "Worst Mini-Series" with amazing belts created by our very own Steve Paugh! You can find Part 2 and Part 3 by clicking on the previous links. Also be sure to check out this week's podcast to hear Kevin and Dustin read and have fun with everyone's worst of list! Thanks for reading and if you’d like to check out the “Best of” list then you can do so here: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and Part 4.

Great Cover, But the Issue Sucked

1 - Great Cover But The Issue Sucked

Jordan - Burn the Orphanage (Image Comics)

I had a lot of hope for Burn the Orphanage after reading some reviews and checking out some artwork. I read it. I do not like Burn the Orphanage.

Kevin - Jailbait #1 (Blue Water Comics)

On the cover you think: Whoa, this looks like a hot chick that's going to whoop some ass. Inside the book: No asses are whooped or shown.

Carl - Kiss Kids #1 (IDW Publishing)

This could have been a twisted, odd comic.  Instead it plays it safe and stays tame.

Steve - Villains Month's Lenticular Covers (DC Comics)

Yeah, pretty much all of 'em...

James - The Villains Month #.1s (Nearly all of them) (DC Comics)

Some of the best covers... with some of the lamest stories ever. Swamp Thing/Arcane 23.1 was the only one of merit to me.

Samantha - Age of Ultron #1 (Samantha)

Marvel has great artists...No doubt, but I could tell from issue one that the cover would not match this pathetic storyline I had to drag through.

Erik - Hinterkind #1 (Vertigo Comics)

This one is pretty simple, nothing really happened. It felt like the creators were still getting a feel for everything.

Jeff - Fearless Defenders #1 (Marvel Comics)

In fact, the whole run of 'Fearless Defenders' had amazing covers by stellar artist Mark Brooks, but the actual book was dreadful, one of the worst bait and switches I've had with a comic.

Dustin - Oz #1 or 2 or 3 (Zenescope Entertainment)

If there was ever a book with a great cover (or covers) it was Oz from Zenescope. I’ve dubbed this series “Sexy Oz” because let’s be honest… that’s what it is. I loved the covers for the first issue. They were great, they got me interested in this new version of Oz and then I opened up the issue and was instantly disappointed by the interior art. I was forgiving of the story at first, but that quickly wore off when it became clear that it wasn’t getting any better or trying to.

Adam - 90% of Zenescope's Catalog (Zenescope)

I'd love to support this publisher since they practically operate in my backyard, but that would go against my integrity and everything I enjoy and value about comics.  I hate their logic on covers, literally every book they ever do has at least 5 covers but the interior art and story just suck most of the time.  And for the people who collect all of these, you're a sucker for buying into this scheme and it's just downright pathetic.  Try to interact with human beings once in a while and not immerse yourself in the world of Sluts in Wonderland.

Worst Ongoing Series

2 - Worst Ongoing Series

Steve - Burn the Orphanage (Image Comics)

What started out as a cool idea to lampoon old, iconic video games quickly became a terrible parody of itself.

Dustin – Blackacre (Image Comics)

I try not to bust on independent books or self-published titles because I know it’s a lot of work for the creators, but this story… this story. I tried, I really tried to read it and understand it all-year-long and I just couldn’t. I’ve finished the majority of the issues, but there were a few that I bailed on after only a few issues. It’s not for me and I don’t understand why it’s still going when it’s hellbent on running itself into the ground.

Samantha – Lazarus (Image Comics)

You have a robot hot chick with family issues. Sounds good, but this title can't keep the emotion alive long enough for me to stay interested.

Adam - Bedlam (Image Comics)

Loved the first story arc, but this second one is majorly disappointing.

Kevin – Voltron (Dynamite Entertainment)

Have you been reading this? Still somehow fails to embody the spirit of my five favorite robot cats.

Erik - Superior Spider-Man (Marvel Comics)

I dislike (hate) everything about this book. The mind of Otto Octavius inside the body of one of the most beloved characters in comic book history? How can this even still be on the shelves? It just doesn’t make sense. I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

Jeff - Fearless Defenders (Marvel Comics)

Misty Knight and Valkyrie team up. Nuff said right? That is until you crack it open and find generic artwork, mundane scripting, and awkward fan-service. With beautiful and badass covers by Mark Brooks it reminds me of Asylum movies where the cover promises a world of cool things but the actual product is notably discount. How did a book with this great of a set up go this wrong?

Carl - Anything 80s Revival

People cash in on the nostalgia and neglect to add any substance to the material.  Shame on you.

Jordan – Droves of Cartoon Spin-off Books That Don’t Contribute Anything Different Than the Show

Seriously, what’s the point?

Worst Mini-Series or One-Shot

3 - Worst Mini-Series or One-Shot

Jordan - Burn the Orphanage (Image Comics)

I do not like Burn the Orphanage.

Kevin - Five Weapons (Image Comics)

Worst is a bit too harsh but this was a mini that I really want to love. The art was fantastic but the story missed on every level for me. With drab pacing and drawn out dialogue, this series was a bit of a disappointment.

Steve - Mara (Image Comics)

This thing is WAY overrated: a flat premise that isn't as groundbreaking or pathos-driven as everyone thinks and has the most wooden art I've ever seen. (Honorable Mention: Polarity - an interesting idea drowned in pretentiousness)

Carl - Any of the Sex Books (Mostly Image Comics)

The recent rash of sexually overt comics have mediocre stories and none of the intelligence to back up the salacious content.  It's like the creators are kids who just learned how to use swear words.

Adam - Zombie War (IDW Publishing)

This is the worst book I've had to read for the site so far.  I just think they tried to jump on the zombie craze and failed miserably.  A lackluster story, terrible name, mediocre art, all for $3.99.  No thanks.

Erik - House of Gold and Bone (Dark Horse Comics)

I’ll admit that I didn’t read many minis this year, but I still know which one disappointed. What hurt the most about it was that I actually did have high hopes for it, but it just didn’t deliver. Then again, I’m really careful about not reading a lot of minis on purpose. I tend to be a bigger fan of ongoing titles.

Samantha - Planet of the Apes: Cataclysm (Boom Studios)

I loved this series, and then it ended without a bang or even a coherent ending. I was very disappointed since this was the first comic that I ever reviewed for Comic Bastards.

James - 3 Guns (Boom Studios)

The sequel to 2 Guns which became a movie; 3 Guns is nothing more than a slick talking "we're too cool" to worry about danger tale that is lame.

Jeff - Robocop: Last Stand (Boom Studios)

*Read the reason on Worst Movie/TV or Video Game Comic Adaptation

Dustin – Polarity (Boom Studios)

To say that I’m a big fan of "Say Anything" would be an understatement, but if you thought I was going to give Max Bemis a free pass on this series then you’re wrong. It pissed me off on how terrible the story was. I’m glad that he’s bringing up the subject of bi-polar since I know there are a lot people affect by it, but again I’m not giving it a free pass just because it pretends to be helpful. This story was so frustratingly bad that I would rank it under Freelancers and I really fucking hated that book.

Dustin’s Honorable Mention – Thanos Rising (Marvel Comics)

Let’s retcon Thanos’ origin! I wonder if this series would have turned out better with the original creative team, but the hype of the book picked up and Marvel shuffled Jason Aaron over to the title and he rammed his cock into it hard. You want to know what this story is about? Thanos is a serial killer that then spreads his seed across the galaxy and then kills all his kids because the woman he “loves” told him to. What’s the point you ask? Thane… it was all a set up for Thane… and that sucked too. -- Keep going with our "Worst of 2013" list by checking out Part 2 and Part 3! Thanks for reading and please leave us a comment below!

Episode 113: 2013 Comic Book Round-Up: Part 2 - The Bad

Here's the second part of year-end round-up that focuses on the bad or the worst of the year. I won't lie; this is one of our favorite episodes to record, so hopefully you enjoy Kevin and I telling you our worst of the year in comics and of course recapping several of our contributors moments as well. Just like with the "Best of/Good" list we'll have a written companion piece for this podcast that will be available in three parts tomorrow. Also if you missed the "Good of 2013" I've included it below as well and you can check out the companion pieces to that here: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 and Part 4. Have a safe and happy New Year from all of us at Comic Bastards and thank you for listening, we'll be back next week with a new episode. The Bad 2013

Episode 112: 2013 Comic Book Round-Up: Part 1 - The Good

Episode 111: A Conversation With Tonatzin Mondragon

X-23 Cosplay... I Really Wish There Was Something More To Say

This one goes out to my friend who just learned that X-23 is dating young time displaced Cyclops and bought the issue because of it even though he didn't know it was the young Cyke or that such a thing even existed. Also that means that Cyclops and Wolverine are finally dating right? I mean that's the thirty year old storyline they've been building to all this time right? RIGHT? RIGHT?!?!

Source

If you're a cosplay hit the "Comic Bastards Is" tab to contact us, we'd love to feature you on the site!